Seven Reasons Why
by halcyon calamity
Summary: When Scorpius received a mysterious little white book, he never expected to learn about Rose Weasley, the girl who disappeared halfway through Seventh Year - or fall in love with her. Read with Scorpius about the seven people who broke her... and if she can still be fixed.
1. Prologue

**Seven Reasons Why**

Summary: Scorpius Malfoy is thrust into an experience he never expected when he is forwarded the magical diary that Rose Weasley, the girl who disappeared, has written to 7 different people, explaining why. Inspired by Jay Asher's novel, _Thirteen Reasons Why._

**Hello everyone, this is my second idea for a ScorpiusxRose fic. I'm a dedicated reader of this pairing and I have to say, there are a lot of fanfics out there that almost have the exact same plot line. This is just something that is different, and I hope you enjoy it! It's inspired by Jay Asher's **_**Thirteen Reasons Why, **_**which, by the way, is an AMAZING book. It is, after all, a New York Times #1 Bestseller! I would really recommend it. This fic will not follow that plot line, however. Just something that popped into my head an hour ago, so I'll see your guys' reaction and then decide whether to continue.**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1<br>**

It started with the book.

He had been taking his books out of his bag to start Professor McGonagall's essay on animagi when a compact white book slipped out, right under his Advanced Potions Making. Scorpius instantly knew it was unfamiliar; it was worn, with the binding broken and with crinkles around the edges. Malfoys were always perfectionists, with perfect, clean cut edges and books that always looked like new. Other than those imperfections, however, the book was immaculate. The cover was a pure white with no markings on it at all, something rare for a color than dirtied so easily.

Scorpius was about to set it aside to take out his quill, but something stopped him. On the back of the book, written in neat handwriting he could recognize anywhere, were the words, _Rose Weasley_, the same ones that had been whispered over and over again in the halls of Hogwarts.

Rose Weasley had been one of the most extraordinary students to grace the school. Of course, a lot of that fame came from the fact that she was a member of the Potter-Weasley clan. Not only that but she was the daughter of two of the Golden Trio. It had been expected that she would be special, and she confirmed that in First Year, as soon as she stepped on the train – she had incapacitated two Slytherin third year that had been terrorizing the new students.

Of course, Rose Weasley had been sorted into Gryffindor and had the top marks in all her classes, tying with Scorpius for first every single year. Rose also played keeper for the Gryffindor quidditch team that consisted of most of her family, and they had won the Cup every year since she joined. Although this could've easily meant popularity, Rose was one of the quiet ones in her family and preferred to associate with only her close group of friends. After scoring all Outstandings in her O.W.L.s, it was no surprise that she was made Head Girl in her seventh year, alongside her cousin Albus, who was Head Boy. Her life was perfect.

Or that's what everyone thought, until she disappeared three weeks ago, smack in the middle of the year. The news soon spread through school like wildfire – Rose had run away of her own free will, obvious from the fact that her whole dormitory was empty. The only thing left was a picture of her and her family - the biggest thing that she'd left behind.

How had the book even ended up in his bag? And, did the book even belong to Rose Weasley? Someone could have easily scribbled her name. Scorpius was sure that the book had been slipped in today, which meant that someone else had done so, since Rose had been gone since three weeks ago. But he remembered something from a few weeks back…

_Scorpius had been studying late at night in the library, which had long since emptied out. The only ones left were him and Rose, as usual. They were acquaintances but not friends and preferred to sit at separate tables. As he concentrated on somehow writing a conclusion for his practice paper, he couldn't help but be distracted by the sound of Rose's quill scratching on parchment, writing furiously. It probably was his imagination, but when Scorpius looked up, he thought he saw a stray tear sliding down her cheek._

Scorpius opened it to the first page, hoping for a clue that would lead him to answers. However, the first page was completely spotless, with not a drop of ink on its surface. The curious thing, however, was that the pages looked worn as well, as if the book had been read numerous times recently. Scorpius muttered a spell as he tapped his wand to the page, hoping to reveal invisible ink, and his heart sped up as the words appeared. 3 words.

**Who are you?**

At first, he did not know how to respond. Scorpius could not believe that the book had actually _talked. _It took an extraordinary amount of magical prowess to do that - the only publicly known happening was Tom Riddle's diary, which had because it had contained a piece of Voldemort's very soul. Then again, it was Rose Weasley. Scorpius worked extremely hard for his grades, but he could not deny that Rose had more magical power than him. Hands shaking, he wrote the words, _Scorpius Malfoy_.

He swore he almost fell over in shock when more words appeared. **Are you alone?**

The anticipation was killing him. Scorpius looked up and noticed that the library was indeed empty. He and Rose used to be the only ones that stayed this late at night. Scorpius could almost envision Rose, sitting at her table in the corner, poring over thick stacks of textbooks again.

_Yes_.

With that one word, the floodgates were opened as more words began flowing out onto the paper, like the rush of a waterfall. Lines of lines of Rose's print-like handwriting continued to fill the page, and as Scorpius noticed, continued onto the next pages of the book. So this was what she had been writing on those late nights in the library? Had she really poured so much out of her into this book that she, the reserved one, could not control a single tear that slid down her cheek?

Not bothering to wait for the writing to stop appearing – obviously that was taking a long time – Scorpius began to read from the beginning, on the first line of the first page.

_Dear Scorpius…_

* * *

><p><strong>So?<strong>_  
><em>

**Love it? Hate it? Meh? Comment! I'm not a very experienced writer, but we'll see how this goes…**


	2. Scorpius

**Seven Reasons Why**

Summary: Scorpius Malfoy is thrust into an experience he never expected when he is forwarded the magical diary that Rose Weasley, the girl who disappeared, has written to 7 different people, explaining why. Inspired by Jay Asher's novel, _Thirteen Reasons Why._

* * *

><p><strong>Last Chapter<strong>

_Yes_.

With that one word, the floodgates were opened as more words began flowing out onto the paper, like the rush of a waterfall. Lines of lines of Rose's print-like handwriting continued to fill the page, and as Scorpius noticed, continued onto the next pages of the book. So this was what she had been writing on those late nights in the library? Had she really poured so much out of her into this book that she, the reserved one, could not control a single tear that slid down her cheek?

Not bothering to wait for the writing to stop appearing – obviously that was taking a long time – Scorpius began to read from the beginning, on the first line of the first page.

_Dear Scorpius…_

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

_Dear Scorpius,_

You are the seventh – well eighth, including me – person to hold this book. You will also be the last.

_If you're reading this it means that you've probably found this strategically placed somewhere so that it just so happened you stumbled across it. Hugo would never take the initiative to talk to you, but he certainly is clever enough to think of another way to get this into your hands – he is half Granger, after all. Don't even get me started on the part of us that is half Weasley._

Scorpius was shocked. So, it really was Rose Weasley who had written this letter. Not only that, be she had specifically written it for him… but why? And was that bitterness he felt in her tone when she said "Weasley?"

_I'm sure that you're sitting in the library right now, all by yourself like the studious Ravenclaw you are, even though I'm not there to be sitting at my table right now. How many nights has it been just the two of us, writing essays for Charms or researching for a Defense the Dark Arts paper, into the long hours of the night? Too many times to count._

Scorpius couldn't help but smile a little, even though the tone of the letter was serious. Weasley and him used to play a game sometimes, seeing who would leave the library last. They wouldn't talk, but there was sort of an unspoken rule that hung in the air. She'd eventually fallen asleep poring over an Ancient Runes textbook, and Scorpius, triumphant, didn't have the heart to wake her and ended up falling asleep himself. Her writing meant that the tension he'd felt, those little games they played, weren't things that he had imagined. They had really happened.

_And yet I never really got to know you, even though we were placed into that situation every time. All that time, though, I was tempted to just look up and smile, and maybe just say hello. Maybe make a comment about the weather, or schoolwork, or quidditch, or anything, really. For us to acknowledge that we were both __there__, just once._

Had she really felt the same way he did?Scorpius had always had a huge amount of respect for Rose Weasley. Staying on top of her grades, being one of the quidditch stars of the school, and leading a quiet social life in spite of the fact that she was famous before she even set foot in the school were just a few of the reasons. Maybe it was the fact that she was so unlike her rowdy cousins in demeanor. Whatever the case was, Scorpius had wanted to at least be able to show that he respected her, but he never got the chance.

_Before I boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time, my dad basically told me to stay away from you and beat you in school. Since still I actually listened to him back then - my parents don't get that luxury anymore, especially now – I didn't make any attempt to befriend you. But I have my morals. I refused to torment you like some of my cousins did._

Scorpius could still remember the first time he'd encountered a member of the Potter-Weasley clan, and unfortunately it had been the prankster, James. Scorpius had never been more embarrassed in his life when his ears had been charmed red on his second day at Hogwarts. The pranks eventually turned into threats and insulting comments when he got older, but Scorpius was never fazed by them. He knew better than to fight back, considering the large numbers of the group, and accepted the fact that they judged him. He understood why they felt that way.

_Truthfully, ever since that sorting hat announced your house that night in first year, I've been fascinated with you. A Malfoy in Ravenclaw? I couldn't imagine what you felt like in those moments. Maybe the reason why I found you so interesting was because we were opposites. I was the golden girl who ended up meeting everyone's expectations with fail – Gryffindor, smart, kind. And yet you were the exact opposite, opposing anything that people expected out of a Malfoy. I felt pressured to be a person I never really was, but you bravely defied the status quo and did your own thing. I respected you immensely for that._

Scorpius was surprised that she had even noticed him and knew all of these things. Scorpius had stayed out of the way of the social hierarchy, preferring to stay alone in the library. At times he conversed with his dorm mates, but other than that he was left alone by the general population of Hogwarts. He tried his best to show that he did not want to be known as a Malfoy, but rather, as Scorpius. Even more shocking was the fact that she respected him for the things he did, or rather, did not do.

There was more to Rose Weasley than he had thought. Much more.

_Why am I telling you all this now? Well, because even though I respected you greatly, I still followed my dad's rule to stay away from you. I never made the attempt to get on good terms with you, but then again, we never really associated in Hogwarts. You were the Ravenclaw that faded into the shadows, and I was the one who attempted to not stand out – and horribly failed. _

Scorpius had never realized that maybe Rose did not enjoy her popularity. Although she kept to her close circle of friends, most people at Hogwarts still adored her for her skill in all aspects of her life. He never would have thought that she was like him, preferring to be secluded.

_I supposed you've heard about my disappearance, and I will tell you how this relates to my decision. I created this book so that I could tell seven people why I left. I wrote letters because when I write I can put my __real__ feelings down without anticipating how you will react. Then again, I don't care how you react, really, as long as you feel some sort of guilt. Each of you plays a part in it in some way, and frankly, you'll be surprised how sharp my words can be. _

_Originally, Scorpius, you weren't part of this list. You've done nothing wrong, so you can keep breathing. _

_Rather it's what __I've__ done._

_Why am I including you on this list of seven people, Scorpius? Well, for starters, seven sounds a lot better than six. _

_Haha. My humor is just amazing._

This girl could joke around, although she felt her life was so unbearable that she abandoned it. The Rose Weasley that Scorpius knew never joked around. Ever. She was always serious and studious. She rarely even smiled.

Then again, he didn't really know her.

_The other reason is that seven has always been considered the most powerful number in the magical world. And Voldemort had seven horcruxes because of that. When I was planning on making this a book, I was reminded of Voldie's diary, and of how much he put into making that – going so far as to commit murder, and putting a piece of his __soul __inside a book that stuck around for 50 years. I want people to know how much I put into writing this – how much it took to relive all these painful memories - and to just __feel __something. I want it to be powerful and maybe even moving. _

_I always though I'd write a heart-wrenching book, but never like this._

_But those are all excuses._

_The real reason I included you on this list is because I regret not getting to know you better, because I never gave you a chance. I would regret it if I didn't do it now. I wasn't like the others that judged you from the very beginning, but I was still unfair towards you, just in a different way. I was disgusted of all those people who couldn't put aside prejudices, but in reality, I was one of them, in a way._

_Can you believe it? Rose Weasley, unfair? What?_

_Well, life is unfair. I learned that already._

_You are the only one out of all these people that I feel deserves an explanation, and therefore, I have to explain everything; that's why I'm letting you read not only this letter, but the ones I've written to everyone else as well. Even though we were never friends, we had some sort of bond from those nights in the library. You are probably the only one I can trust with all this information. It's my life compacted into six pretty short letters, but in the end, you might understand why I left. You might be surprised by some of the people and the things they've done. Others not so much; it is Hogwarts, after all, and when there's gossip, especially about the Weasleys, it spreads like wildfire._

_Read on if you dare._

Rose was offering him a chance to peek into her life – or at least, her former life – to understand why she had left so abruptly. Of all people, she had chosen him. They weren't even friends, but Rose had been right – they did share a bond, one that neither could comprehend. Either way, Scorpius was curious. He wanted to learn more about Rose Weasley, the enigma.

Most of all, he wanted to see if he could have done anything to help her.

But not tonight, he decided. It was much too late, past curfew, and Scorpius did not plan on falling asleep in the library again. He packed up his bag, muttered a disillusionment charm on himself, and continued to Ravenclaw tower.

It wasn't until he was in bed that he remembered: he had not started his Transfiguration essay at all.

**Hi guys! So, I updated this earlier than I thought. Thank you to all that reviewed! It definitely encouraged me to continue this story. Comments? Suggestions? **

**This chapter, I first wrote Rose's letter out – that way it would flow better – before adding in Scorpius' thoughts in between passages. Originally I wasn't planning on writing his thought sequences in the middle of the letter, but I felt that since this is a romance, I might as well, otherwise the plot wouldn't be as reasonable.**

**Who do you think are the six people that Rose wrote to? Clue: 4 of them are family members, one is a family friend, and one is a very commonly used OC**


	3. Albus

**Wow, guys, thank you for your lovely reviews! I didn't expect to get that many, especially since I'm an inexperienced writer, but you guys are awesome! This story I actually have vaguely planned out until the end, so I'm guessing it'll be about ten chapters… but it'll be a miracle if I actually complete this, since I'm at school and I have such a heavy course load.**

**Some of you guessed which characters will be in this story, and your guesses were very, VERY, close. I'm a bit disappointed in myself because I didn't want this story to be that predictable. BUT you'll probably be surprised at how I've written them out to be – or rather, what Rose has written to them.**

**If you've seen the chapter title you know that this letter is written to Albus. The next one will be revealed at the end of the letter for Albus to pass it on. Sorry for the author's note… I'm sure you all just want to read the story!**

* * *

><p><strong>Previous Chapter: Scorpius<strong>

Rose was offering him a chance to peek into her life – or at least, her former life – to understand why she had left so abruptly. Of all people, she had chosen him. They weren't even friends, but Rose had been right – they did share a bond, one that neither could comprehend. Either way, Scorpius was curious. He wanted to learn more about Rose Weasley, the enigma.

Most of all, he wanted to see if he could have done anything to help her.

But not tonight, he decided. It was much too late, past curfew, and Scorpius did not plan on falling asleep in the library again. He packed up his bag, muttered a disillusionment charm on himself, and continued to Ravenclaw tower.

It wasn't until he was in bed that he remembered: he had not started his Transfiguration essay at all.

* * *

><p>Chapter 3: Albus<p>

Scorpius was alone in the seventh year Ravenclaw boys' dormitory. Earlier that evening he'd finished his animagi essay – thank god yesterday had been a Friday – and had carried a light but awkward conversation with his dorm mates. Since today was Saturday, everyone was invited to Fred Weasley's party in the Room of Requirement, which he threw once a month on the last Saturday. Consequently, his dorm was empty, and probably would be until the morning; last time his dorm mates had went, they'd passed out and woken up the next afternoon in the deserted room.

Scorpius had been thinking about Rose's letters all day, but hadn't found a place where he wouldn't be disturbed while reading; many students were in the library doing their homework – they usually slacked off Friday night and picked up their schoolwork the next morning – and Scorpius didn't want everyone to see him reading the book, and with his emotions displayed on his face for them to see. The common room at the moment was packed with kids from the lower years, as they were not allowed into the party. But now he was alone, comfortable, and couldn't wait any longer. He gingerly slid the book out of his school bag and turned it open. He skimmed the first few pages that he had read yesterday until he got to the part when Rose ended his letter and attached the others. Settling down on his bed, Scorpius was ready to uncover more secrets that the mysterious Rose had…

_Albus, _

_If you're reading this, this is the most effort you've ever taken concerning me. You might not think so, but it's true. _

_The truth sucks. Get over it. I did a long time ago._

_If you're reading this it means that you've found this book where I left it, in your bedroom. It wasn't really hard leaving it there either. It's not like you ever cared where I was. _

Scorpius literally had his mouth hanging open, just seven sentences in. It was thought around Hogwarts that Albus Potter and Rose Weasley were best friends, which had been cemented when they stuck together like glue on the first train ride.

_But I've always cared about you, Albus. Always._

_What is this you ask? This is my letter to you, but it's easier to write in a book than on a piece of parchment with no one noticing. You might remember me writing in this next to the fireplace in our common room. Probably not. You couldn't even stand being in the same room as me, let alone notice what I was doing all those late nights._

_You want to know how this happened? Let's flash back six and a half years ago. We were the little first years excited about coming to Hogwarts. You might remember us sitting in the same compartment, and us freaking out – mostly you. You were the one that was scared of being in Slytherin. Funny, about that. Look where you are now. _

Scorpius could easily remember the first night of their first year. Even though the hall had been silenced from his own sorting into Ravenclaw, it hadn't compared to Albus Potter's name being called right after. The whispers had broken out while the black haired boy sat stoically in front of everyone, but they had quickly gone out when the hat had proclaimed the younger Potter boy to be a Slytherin. Scorpius remembered the shocked look on all the redheads at the Gryffindor table, and he now could not imagine what Rose, his best friend at the time, had felt like.

_Once that hat was off your head, you didn't even look in my direction. You walked to your table, sat down, and acted like nothing had just happened. And every time you sat down at that table, every morning, I would look at you from the other side of the Great Hall, stare at you, hope that you would just make eye contact – and you never did._

_I couldn't lose hope. I convinced myself that it was merely a school thing. I thought that maybe, you were afraid that even though we were family and the closest of friends, you thought that house prejudices were in place and didn't want to associate at school. I was okay with that. I understood. If that's what you call a thousand fallen tears. _

Albus was well-known around the school to be an introvert, much like Scorpius himself, even though he had a myriad of cousins and siblings at Hogwarts. He mostly chose to stick around with his own housemates and rarely loitered anywhere besides the Slytherin common room, his own dormitory, and the Great Hall for meals. Rumor had it that the family had chosen to not stick as close together at school as they were at home, but now that Scorpius though about it, he had never seen Albus associate with any of his family members at all.

_I eagerly waited for Christmas to come, so that it would just be family again and we could have snowball fights and dare each other to dive into the frozen lake, as if we were your dad. The whole train ride I didn't try to find you, thinking you probably counted this at school. We stood next to each other with our family at King's Cross, but I didn't even look in your direction, despite my urge to just turn and smile, to just share one thing. _

_But the moment we got to the Burrow, you were gone in your room and didn't come out._

_My heart nearly broke, if that was possible for an eleven year old, but I ignored it and slipped a note under your door to meet me at the lake after dinner. I rushed my meal, and quickly stood up, pushing the food away and saying I was full. I looked meaningfully at you, but you, like always, didn't make eye contact. I thought that maybe you didn't want to give our meeting away, so I headed outside to wait for you to finish._

_Do you know how long I waited for you, Albus? In the snow? A storm was coming in, but I stayed and waited. Waited and waited. For more than an hour. My hair was damp, my shoes soaked, my fingers numb, my face frozen, yet I waited. The hope in me diminished gradually and gradually, until finally I went in, to find you holed up in your room again._

Scorpius' heart was aching from just seeing these words written on the page. The pain was clearly conveyed through those simple yet powerful sentences. Rose's spirit had truly been broken all those years ago. Carrying that burden for so long – how had she done it? And how had no one noticed?

_After that, Albus, I stopped trying for 5 years. I wasn't ready to end our friendship, but you were done already, and I couldn't do anything about it. 5 years, Albus. Sitting across form you in the Great Hall, having potions with you, being at the same prefect meetings, living in the same house with you for three months a year – and never once did I try again. I thought about it every day, though. Over the summers I used to be afraid that someone would hear me crying myself to sleep, since I couldn't use a Silencing Charm._

The Rose Scorpius knew never cried. Ever. She, like himself, carefully controlled her emotions at all times and made sure her face was a blank slate. Scorpius had been brought up studying people reactions, especially with the prejudice against his family, and he knew that when Rose smiled, it never reached her eyes. When she laughed, there was something missing in the sound. And when she was disappointed or frustrated, such in during schoolwork or Quidditch, she maintained an icy exterior and repeated that she was fine over and over again to anyone that asked how she was doing.

_I thought it was fate that we were chosen for Head Boy and Head Girl this year. There was no way you could avoid me now. There were prefect meetings to plan, rounds schedules to make, a dorm to share! And yet, somehow you did. You planned all the prefect meetings and rounds schedules before I could ask about them, and made sure that we were never in the common room at the same time. Everyone thought that we were closer than ever, but in reality we had never been more far apart._

_Did you really hate me so much that you did hours of extra work, doing all the duties, just so that you wouldn't have to look at my face?_

_It hurt, Al. It really did. And it still does._

Of course, Scorpius realized. He had not even taken into account the headliner of this year – Albus Potter and Rose Weasley were the Heads, which sparked a lot of rumors about favoritism, even though the two both were highly qualified for their positions. McGonagall – yes, the old bat was still here – had obviously not known the tensions between these two, otherwise she would definitely not have chosen them. Then again, if they'd been able to hide from all of Hogwarts, it was no surprise that they'd been able to hide it from just one of the many professors at the school.

_I used to think that I did something wrong that caused us to drift apart. I used to lie awake at night thinking about it. And you know what? I realized it's not my fault._

_It's you're fault, you stupid, unfeeling, selfish prick._

_I wonder if you feel sorry. Just a tiny bit remorseful. _

_I just feel sorry that I tore myself apart about this for 5 fucking years._

_You're wondering why I had to write this now, aren't you? Well, Albus, go take a look at the inside of my dorm. I'm not in there ready to castrate you. If you look inside, and look at what's strange– what's gone and what's left behind – you'll see why I gave this to you now._

_Give this to Alice Longbottom next._

_If only I could hate you,_

_Rose_

Those last, straightforward words revealed something to Scorpius.

One, that she had the ability to swear, something he'd never seen her do before.

Two, that she had far more bitterness and pain inside of her than what was healthy, but could still not bring herself to hate the people that had caused them.

And three, that he had so many more things that he did not know about her.

* * *

><p><strong>Those last three lines were modeled off of the summary of Twilight – a sort of parody, if I must say. :)<br>**

**Yes, I am not a Twihard. Definitely not. BUT there is a very, very, very awesome fanfiction that has redeemed it in my eyes, and I thought I could share it, because it is truly amazing. Give it a try! Basically it's if Bella actually had some sense in her xD**

**http:/ luminous. elcenia. com/**

**When school started I literally forgot all about this story… until someone favorited it yesterday, which reminded me that this was on my computer! That also means that I haven't gotten very far with Alice's chapter… I was originally not going to update until I finished the next chapter, but I felt that all you favoriters and reviewers deserved something for patiently waiting ^_^So don't expect me to update very soon...  
><strong>

**Comments? Questions? Guesses on what Alice's letter will be about? Leave them!**


	4. Alice

**Hello, readers!**

**I am so sorry that I haven't updated in more than a month. Please don't be mad at me. I was really busy with school and whatnot, and then I kind of lost inspiration for this fic and developed writer's block (AH NOOOO! THE CURSED WRITER'S BLOCK!). I have worked especially hard to write this chapter and to start the next one already so that I won't leave you guys hanging for too long again…**

**Special thanks to MoonNightmare, one of my best friends, who is so awesome that she has actually read my story and has graciously offered to edit, since I don't… sadly she has not written anything herself yet *ahem* so I am currently pressuring her to do so, and we are considering writing a collab in the near future! Anyway, this is the first chapter that she has worked her magic on, so you will probably seeing fewer errors than before… **

**Ah well. On to the story!**

* * *

><p><strong>Previous chapter: Albus<strong>

Those last, straightforward words revealed something to Scorpius.

One, that she had the ability to swear, something he'd never seen her do before.

Two, that she had far more bitterness and pain inside of her than what was healthy, but could still not bring herself to hate the people that had caused them.

And three, that he had so many more things that he did not know about her.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4: Alice<strong>

Scorpius looked out the window of the common room, watching as the rain pelted the glass and painted itself down the pane. Most of the Ravenclaws were now in the library, having procrastinated and left their homework until Sunday night. The small number of his housemates that hadn't were involved in conversation or games of Exploding Snap around the room. It was probably as much privacy as he would get, and he had been itching to continue reading Rose's words. Glancing around to make sure that no one was watching – not that they ever paid attention to him, the fly on the wall – he slipped the white book out of his bag and quickly turned to where he had left off yesterday.

_Alice,_

_It's me._

_Rose._

_Your "best" friend._

_Let's start from the beginning, shall we?_

_I've known you all my life – and even before. Aunt Hannah and my mom were always comparing the sizes of their baby bumps, and they were sure that we would be the best of friends at school. However, we were really never that close in the first ten years, considering that I was always with Albus, and you hung around with Dominique more often than not._

_Scorpius' mind raced as he tried to picture Alice Longbottom, the daughter of the Head of Gryffindor House. She had never stayed in the library with Rose, but Scorpius could vaguely remember her sitting next to Rose in classes. Now that he thought about it, Alice and Rose had stuck like glue together throughout their years in the castle, probably due to the fact of their war hero parents._

_But since we were the only two children from the extended family that made it to Gryffindor in our year, it was natural that we became very close. I guess it was cemented by the fact that we both were in the spotlight, with my famous family and your father. We were completely opposite, but for some reason becoming friends was just so easy__.__I continued to discover that we really had so many things in common, things that I would never have imagined you'd be interested in. It was almost suspicious, how coincidental it was._

_I should've trusted my gut._

_Because the truth is that you used me, Alice. You found it easier to tag onto me than Dominique and consequentially made sure that we were joined at the hip. You made up lies so that I would like you. The joy you had when I made top marks, or when I got asked out by a guy, or when I made the Quiddit_c_h team – I had thought you'd been happy for me. But now I realize, you were happier because I was becoming more well-known around the school. Every time I became more popular, you did too, in your position as "Rose Weasley's best friend." You were bitter that I was more admired than you, but you kept it to yourself._

Scorpius tried to wipe the emotion off his face, as there were people sitting around him, but he could feel the anger and disgust rising in his chest. So Alice Longbottom had been using Rose all along, for popularity. He almost couldn't believe it, but it made sense. He was remembering more and more about this girl that was Rose's friend, and things he had learned weren't exactly pretty. Despite being housemates, Weasley and Alice were almost exact opposites. Rose kept to herself and loved to work alone, while Alice was constantly with other students and was not exactly the brightest witch of the castle. Another thing: Longbottom had a reputation for having a loud mouth and being a huge gossip, while also being a huge suck-up to the professors. Scorpius had generally viewed her as an annoying brat who had it easy, born into a famous family and instantly accepted at Hogwarts, unlike himself.

_But the lying isn't the worst part. What tore my heart apart even more was the fact that I had trusted you with my secrets. In our circle of close friends, you were the one that tied me to them. Without you I would have been an outcast. With that knowledge, I felt indebted to you and went as far as to tell you about the things that were happening with the family._

_I had always wondered how the gossip had gotten out so quickly._

_I blinded myself because I trusted you too much, Alice. The signs were all there, clear as day, but never did I doubt you._

_The vandalism to my stuff in the dorms that I attributed to James playing a joke? Classy, Alice. Real classy._

_By the time seventh year rolled around, I had gotten the position of Head Girl, something that I'd been working for all these years. I made sure to send you a letter about the news when I dashed upstairs after getting my letter. Minutes later you wrote back, proclaiming how happy you were for me._

_You must have felt such a rush when you read those words. I had reached the very top, and I'd taken you with me along the way._

_But you wanted more, Alice. You were too greedy. You had gotten your popularity, but you wanted more. You needed to make sure that you exploited my trust in you in every way possible. So what better could I do than to give you Albus?_

Scorpius couldn't help thinking that Alice should've been in Slytherin. She'd hurt Rose in more ways than one, each time deepening the cuts on her heart. But Albus? That was when the line was crossed. Having just read Albus' story yesterday, Rose's sorrow and grief were still fresh in his mind.

_I could feel us slowly drifting apart when school started, and I deluded myself into thinking)that the reason why was because we didn't share a dorm anymore, like we had for the past six years. I rarely saw you outside of classes and meals. When I did, it was because you came by the Heads Common Room and made sure to primp yourself before arriving, just in case Albus came down those stairs for once. When we talked, you always asked how __Albus__was doing, how the prefect meeting had went with __Albus__, if you could hang out with me in the common room that I shared with __Albus__._

_If I'd told you about the tension between Albus and me, I'm sure you would have tossed me away right when the year started. But I hadn't, mostly because I was still recovering from the pain of the loss of my friendship with him, a freshly opened wound once we were named Heads. I broke down after you badgered me about it, and spilled._

_And then you were gone._

_You never came to my dorm anymore, you avoided me at meals, and you made sure to partner up with someone else in our classes. I didn't understand why at first, Alice. I was still naïve. In all the turmoil that was happening in my life, I expected you to stick by me, like you had before. It wasn't until I saw you happily chatting away with Dominique and her little clique, like you had before Hogwarts, did I realize that you'd used me all this time._

Of course she had left Rose. Scorpius had heard the rumors of Alice and Rose's broken friendship. The theories being whispered in the halls of Hogwarts were impossible. One of them was how Rose had stolen a guy that Alice had been keeping her eye on. Another was that Alice had hooked up with Rose's cousin, James, after her warnings of his playboy tendencies. Whatever people were repeating out there, Scorpius was sure that they would never imagined _this._

Rose's bitterness was practically tangible to Scorpius. And he understood why. Rose's heart had been broken by a failed relationship, albeit not a romantic one. Having been deceived for such a long time by the person she trusted the most – it was as if her life had been a series of twisted lies. Would she ever find someone to trust again?

_You're such a selfish bitch._

_So you wanted popularity. Some shallow people are just like that. But not all of them use others, like you did._

_I worked my fucking ass off for six years to get to where I am now. I sacrificed my social life for the library, I did extra Quidditch practices, and I stuck with the rules, no matter how much I was teased as a prude, to ensure my appointment as prefect, then Head Girl._

_So maybe I didn't crave popularity, but I did crave something else._

This was surprising. Scorpius had always thought that Rose was content being a hardworking, perfect girl, but it sounded here as if she was almost _resentful_ that she did those things. And what did she mean by a craving for something else? Rose had achieved or been given anything that she could have ever wanted, so why had she written this line at all? Scorpius made a mental note to keep this in mind later on.

_I didn't use my last name, no matter how many people thought I did. I didn't use my older cousins' talents, and I sure as hell didn't use you. I used myself and my own ways to get what I wanted._

_I find your kind the most despicable. It would've been better if you placed a fucking Confundus Charm on the whole shitty school,for all I care, as long as you didn't use others for your own gain._

_By now, the whole school probably knows that I'm not there anymore. I'm sure that this time, you'll have enough common sense to not spread any more rumors._

_Blood is thicker than water - thank god we don't share any._

_I intend for you to feel the guilt for the rest of your life, bitch._

_Rose_

_P.S. Pass this on to Lily_.

Scorpius sighed and closed the book, emotionally exhausted by reading the letter. This one held far more bitterness than the previous letter to Albus. With Alice, Rose had lost a best friend, her trust in others, and most of all, her trust in herself. No human being deserved that, and Rose Weasley certainly did not.

As Scorpius slowly headed up the staircase to his own dormitory and got ready for bed, a thought crossed his mind that would keep him awake for the rest of the night.

_She had trusted him._

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry there wasn't much Scorpius commentary in this chapter... hopefully the letter made up for it. I promise, next chapter has a lot of Scorpius commentary in it! Lots of foreshadowing in this chapter… let's see if you guys can guess what's coming next! If you have a guess, leave it in a review!<strong>

**So I'm not usually one that will beg for reviews, but since this was an OC, and a different characterization of it, I would love it if you guys did. Feedback is really important to me, and I want to know if you all want to see some changes in how I write! Comments? Questions? Leave them as a review as well!**


	5. Lily

**I'm so sorry guys. Yell at me all you want, I deserve it ): It was hard picking up Seven Reasons Why again after I started moving on to other stories, especially because this story has a much different tone than my other fics. Believe it or not, I spend a lot of time carefully choosing my wording so that I can express Rose's emotions clearly. This is the halfway chapter, so please enjoy!**

* * *

><p>The winter snow cascaded into the castle grounds Wednesday night, accenting the school with a festive touch. The holidays were rapidly approaching but that did not discourage the professors from assigning dreadful amounts of homework. Scorpius sat warily by the Ravenclaw fireplace, massaging his forehead while glancing every once in a while out the window to glare at the Gryffindors as they pelted each other with snowballs, laughing and running.<p>

Alice Longbottom was among them, but even Scorpius could see from his vantage point that there was something wrong with her. Her motions were less animated and more robotic, as if she was merely participating to satisfy her friends. Scorpius had observed her in class ever since Monday and had found this to be what she did most of the time.

After reading Rose's bitter words Sunday night, Scorpius had tentatively questioned his roommates about Alice. They had been mildly surprised – Scorpius had never taken an interest in girls, especially Gryffindors – but responded nonetheless. It seemed that since two weeks ago, she had been markedly reserved and refused to party like she used to. Another interesting fact – it had been seen repeatedly that Longbottom had been avoiding members of the Weasley family.

Scorpius was sure this meant that Rose's words had rattled her after Alice had read them two weeks ago. And the only reason that she would be avoiding the Weasleys was that she truly felt guilty.

Scorpius saw this effect on her and wondered if Rose really wanted her, and Albus, to fall into a fit of despair. Her words said this, but Scorpius felt that he understood Rose after reading the little white book, and to him, it seemed that Rose was just looking for a way to release the anger that was bottled up inside of her. But even so, he almost felt _scared _that if he kept reading, more secrets and acts of betrayal would be revealed. Malfoys weren't ever supposed to be scared, but Scorpius wasn't sure if he wanted to continue.

His doubts were overcome, however, when he thought more about what he had already read. He truly was curious about everything, and Rose, for some reason, _wanted_ him to know these things – otherwise, she wouldn't have sent them to him.

That was how Scorpius found himself opening the book again, this time in the back corner of the library rather than his usual table. He didn't want to be found – not now.

_Lily:_

_It's your cousin. You know, the one that you hate._

_Oops! I forgot. You hate all of us anyway._

Lily Potter. Scorpius knew who she was – but didn't everyone? Daughter of The Chosen One and a famous war heroine/star quidditch player, sister of two of the most-talked-about people of the school, the baby of the family the whole school seemed to revolve around.

And, of course, the resident Ice Queen.

Now a fifth year, the conventionally pretty girl had rejected hordes of boys hoping they were the one she would accept – and not nicely either. Lily Potter had a tongue of venom and closed herself off from most people, except for those she really trusted.

_It wasn't always that way. I remember, years ago, you actually used to smile._

_Lily Luna Potter, smiling? Unheard of._

_I suppose everything changed when you came to Hogwarts, and the Sorting Hat decided that siblings should really stick together, and put you in Slytherin._

Scorpius still remember the sorting from his third year – Lily Potter had been sorted into Slytherin, but none of her family members had truly seemed surprised, now that he thought about it. He'd attributed it to the fact that Albus Potter was already a Slytherin, but now he wondered – could it have been for a different reason?

_It wasn't like Albus talked to anyone in the family anyway, so I'm pretty sure they need a new Sorting Hat._

It was here that Scorpius saw a giant ink splotch, perhaps from a spilt pot of ink. After observing Rose countless times in the library, he had never seen her make a mistake, let alone spill ink. Not only that, but she hadn't erased it with her wand either. She'd been too caught up in her emotions – those of resentment, with a tint of sadness.

_We tried with you, Lily, we really did. And, exactly like Albus, you pushed us away. Poser much? _

_I suppose you had your excuses for it too. We knew that you hated being in your parents and brothers' shadows. James was thoroughly convinced you asked the Sorting Hat to sort you into Slytherin in an act of rebellion._

_We saw the way your eyes flashed when the hat opened its giant mouth to proclaim its verdict. A few moments before you were sitting on the stool with your eyes tightly shut, your hands gripping the edge of your seat, and a look of pain and confusion etched upon your face._

_When the hat made its declaration, I clapped politely as you sentenced yourself to the life of a Slytherin. James, a few seats down, quietly scratched at the wood of the Gryffindor table – one of the few times I ever saw him so reserved, as if a piece of his boisterous soul had left him._

Scorpius wondered if Lily had been close to her family – it seemed as if James had felt very protective of her. If so, it was definitely a contrast from the cold exterior she set up at Hogwarts.

_Letting go of you was harder than Albus, in a way, because you had always been the baby of the family. And we understood that maybe, you didn't want to be that little girl anymore. _

_But Hugo kept his faith in you. You'd always been the troublesome twosome, playing together before you knew your own names, practically inseparable. You promised to be best friends no matter what, to stick through Hogwarts together, to make a name for yourself in the halls where your relatives were considered heroes._

_Don't make promises you can't keep._

_By now, even Hugo's given up. And he's the most sickeningly patient person I know. _

Lily Potter had abandoned her family like Albus did? Now that Scorpius thought about it, he'd never seen her associate with other members of the Weasley clan, but he'd assumed that it had been a way to keep up her icy exterior. The Potter girl had always been the leader of the Slytherin girls of her year and very high maintenance. He'd seen her share looks with her family members – but they very well could have been looks of animosity…

_Are you happy you've hurt him the deepest way you possibly can? You avoid his eyes, so you don't seen the pain that lies there. They're hollow, dead. The once-outgoing boy I knew is withdrawn, quiet. At home, I see the scars he makes on his own wrists, the cries of anguish at night. He knows he can't get away with it at Hogwarts. At Hogwarts, every minute of his life is spent supporting others, and he refuses to let them see him in such a state._

_As much as I want to as his older sister, I can't save him._

Scorpius was shocked that Rose had revealed this bit of private information with Lily. Hugo Weasley had always been a well-liked, happy-go-lucky kid that was delighted to help anyone when they needed it… no one would have ever guessed that he was cutting himself. Scorpius suspected that Rose had thrown this at Lily as a way to make her guilty, as well as finally tell someone this piece of information.

_We understood that things were hard on you, but we thought that maybe you were just a little too self-centered to notice how much you were hurting everyone else._

_But I know the truth, Lily. You do it on purpose. Everything you do is calculated so that in the end, at least one person gets hurt._

_But really? I'd never thought that you had no morals, to the extent you'd sleep with your own cousin's boyfriend. Just another part of your "originality."_

_Imagine my fucking surprise when I catch you and him, going at it like rabbits while I'm doing my prefect rounds._

Seducing Rose's boyfriend? How low could a girl go? Scorpius knew that Lily really didn't have much interest in the male population – obvious from her rejections of countless boys. Scorpius didn't doubt Rose's reasoning that the Potter girl had specifically done it to hurt Rose. She might've been jealous of Rose's popularity, like Alice, or maybe she had just wanted to mar her perfect image.

Rose had only had one official boyfriend during her time at Hogwarts – the two had been together for at least a year. Scorpius remembered it quite clearly because during that time, her boyfriend would often come to the library with her. He had felt as if their private moment – the one time they actually had contact – was invaded.

_What really sucks for you is that I didn't even love him. So in the end, you didn't affect me as much as you wanted to._

_I didn't tell anyone what you did. You want to know why?_

_A cruel bitch like you doesn't deserve to be the talk of the school. If I had spread the rumor, your infamy would have only increased, something you would have been delighted with._

_I knew that if I made the truth public, I'd drag our – no, my – family into another complicated issue. We didn't want all the attention. I didn't want to give you the opportunity to hurt them again._

_And maybe, just maybe, I felt some pity for that little ten-year-old girl that everyone used to love dearly. _

Above anything else, Scorpius felt this conveyed Rose's love for her family. Protecting them by withholding one piece of information couldn't do anything, right?

Wrong. It had played a part in driving her away from everyone she knew, and breaking her very spirit.

_I owe you no favors._

_You really do belong in Slytherin. You're a cold-hearted, conniving bitch that actually enjoys the pain of others. Maybe if you actually had a heart you'd realize that the world doesn't fucking revolve around you. As far as I'm concerned, you are not a Weasley. You and your brother can go die in a hole together. If you weren't siblings you'd be fucking perfect for each other._

_Give this to that cheating bastard, Lorcan._

_Rose._

Scorpius remained stationary, the book still open in his hands after he finished reading. Another person that Rose had once loved, but had been hurt by. She couldn't trust anyone anymore, but she still trusted him with her darkest secrets. Had she lost her ability to love as well?

For that one moment, Scorpius could fantasize that she loved him.

But for now, her trust was enough.

* * *

><p><strong>Okay guys! That was the fifth chapter – and really hard for me to write. I wrote this on two separate occasions – I wrote Lily's letter first a few months ago, then put it away and revisited recently to write Scorpius's part.<strong>

**Special thanks to MoonNightmare to contributing to a specific passage in the chapter!**

**I really am sorry for my lateness, but… you do know that reviews inspire me to write faster, right? So please do :D I really want to know about your thoughts. They help me become a better writer and also immerse myself in the fanfic community. Especially Lily's character – I tried my best to make her a easily hate-able person. Did I succeed? And Scorpius' thought at the end – do you feel that it was to abrupt? It is a romance, after all – kinda hard when they're not exactly interacting in the story. I might go back after completing the story and change around some stuff.**

**High school season for swimming is starting, and that, along with my other commitments, make me slightly worried that I'm going to go off the radar. Help me by reviewing! And yes, reviewing a long time after updates does help me (:**


	6. Lorcan

**Please don't kill me.**

**I am so, so sorry for bailing on you guys. I tried to write this and I couldn't. I've never experienced something like what Rose is going through and I couldn't convey Rose's emotions right. I would've been disappointed in myself if I published something I didn't like. I wrote about 5 drafts of this and deleted each one, and this is my final one. I'm still not satisfied with it, but it's time to move on. Enjoy.**

* * *

><p>Scorpius sat at his table in the library once more, looking across to see the empty table, where Rose used to sit. He half-expected her to walk through the library doors and talk her seat, bringing with her a mountain of books that she was intent on reading.<p>

The thought made him smile.

She'd been so, so strong through everything – the betrayals, betrayals and more betrayals. It seemed unreal that all this could happen to one person.

But it did.

Scorpius scooped up his papers into his bag and strode over to Rose's table, taking a seat and imagining himself in her place. Surrounded by books, alone.

But not really alone, hm? Because he'd always sat across from her.

He mentally hit himself for never doing anything. She'd been breaking down in front of his very eyes and he'd never even noticed. No one had noticed.

He didn't know how she did. He'd seen Lily Potter just this morning, sitting outside in the freezing December weather, not surrounded by her Slytherin minions for once. Her face was gaunt, her hair pulled up into a straggly bun. The Lily Potter he had always seen had been put-together, with perfect hair and perfect makeup. This girl was broken.

Rose had been broken too. Not noticeably – but maybe it was because she had been beyond repair.

Sighing, Scorpius reached into his bag and pulled out the diary, willing himself to open it. He didn't want to read any more of Rose's troubles, but there was something that urged him to keep reading.

_Lorcan –_

_I think there was a time, long ago, that I was in love with you. _

'_Long ago?' you're thinking._

_Oops. I forgot your brain doesn't have the mental capacity to think._

Lorcan Scamander. Scorpius remembered him. Tall, sandy-haired, quick smile, Gryffindor Golden Boy, and perfect fit for the Golden Girl, Rose Weasley. But the Golden Couple had broken off abruptly last year, to the shock of most of the castle. Having read Lily's letter, Scorpius knew it was because Lorcan had cheated with Rose's cousin. But for some reason, instead of being sad, she seemed angry. Shouldn't a heartbroken girl have been pining, not raging?

_Ten years ago, it was easy believe. Me being in love with you, I mean. You were the cute boy that always came 'round the Burrow. I remember thinking it was a shame that you and Lysander were fraternal twins, not identical; he had failed to be blessed with your good looks. All the other girls, except for Victoire – who was already so sure she and Teddy would become a couple someday – giggled when you weren't looking, discussed your hair, your laugh, your smile during sleepovers. Dominique laid her claim on you the first time she touched your arm and fluttered her lashes._

_Of course, you wouldn't understand._

_Ugh. Boys._

_But out of all my other cousins, you chose me. Me, the girl who shied away from commotion and preferred solitude, to be your friend._

_I was more than glad to catch fireflies with you at night during those summers, and listen to you talk about the latest issue of Super Merlin. The boys teased us, and the girls through envious looks my way, but it was worth it to spend time with you, even if I was relegated to "close friend" status. I was so caught up in what I was feeling: elation, happiness, and, just maybe, a little bit of triumph._

Scorpius hadn't known Rose and Lorcan were good friends before Hogwarts. They'd never been particularly close, as far he saw, until they started dating. He supposed it made sense, though, with his mother being a war heroine with Rose's parents. He;d never exactly talked to Lorcan, but he had struck up a conversation (albeit reluctantly) with Lysander, who was in Hufflepuff, once of twice and had found him to be intelligent enough, if not a little quirky.

_And then we got to Hogwarts._

_I was ecstatic when we both were sorted into Gryffindor. Of course, we couldn't be best friends anymore. You finally found boys your age to rant to about the latest comic, and I, eventually, found Alice, who had taken a sudden interest in me._

_But we were still friends. We shared the same classes, ate together at some meals, studied together (but never at the library – you refused to set foot into the library, saying it was my plan to turn you into a nerd), talked and laughed. Sometimes, we would sit outside facing the Black Lake on a peaceful evening, and you would join me as I enjoyed the solitude. When Albus left, you stayed. For that I was forever grateful. _

_I still might be._

_The thing is, they don't tell you the truth about forever – how, really, there is no forever. Everything, bad or good, must come to an end._

_For example, I thought I would be relegated to the position as "friend" for forever. _

_That ended when you asked me to go to Hogsmeade with you in Fourth Year._

_Back then, I was still the naïve little girl in love with you. On that first date, you were a perfect gentleman. You bought me my drink, opened doors and pulled out chairs for me, held my hand the whole time, and gave me a chaste kiss at the very end, before I headed up to my dorm._

_And I fell deeper._

Buying her a drink, holding her hand, kissing her… Scorpius fantasized he was the one in Lorcan's place. She was beautiful, intelligent, witty, and kind. Scamander had been stupid enough to throw her away, the one-of-a-kind Rose Weasley, but that wasn't the worst part. Either he had eventually stopped caring about her – impossible, Scorpius thought – or he had misled her from the very start. His fists unconsciously clenched at the idea.

_Not to mention that my parents loved you. I'm pretty sure there were adults that were betting on our relationship ever since we had been little children. _

_But there was a point, between then and the end of Sixth Year, when I fell out of love. I still loved you, but I wasn't in love with you. You didn't make my heart beat fast or my palms sweat; in fact, if you want to put it that way, I never really was in love with you. I'm not sure if it was because we were better off as friends rather than, well, more than friends, or the fact that we were changing as people. Either way, I was comfortable with you. I sure as hell didn't know if you were the one for me, but I liked spending time with you more than before, and that was that._

_That, and the pressure of the whole school and my whole family._

_Somewhere along the way, we became the Golden Couple. It was nauseating, really. There had been more than one occasion when a girl would stop me and coo about how cute we were together and wouldn't it be just great if we eventually ended up getting married because we would have the most adorable babies? And then at home, Victoire, who'd gotten married to Teddy after being childhood friends, squealed about we could have another pairing in the extended Potter-Weasley clan._

_Just the thought of it makes me want to throw up._

Scorpius hadn't even taken into account the fact that her relationship had been affected by her and her family's reputation. The pressure had forced her to strive for perfection in grades, athletics – Scorpius hadn't even considered that it had forced her to keep the pretense of a perfect relationship. Something so private shouldn't have been.

_And then, some time during Sixth Year, you suggested that we should take our relationship to the "next level."_

_Okay, definitely wanting to throw up right now._

_I told you I wasn't ready, that I was nervous, and you said I should think about it._

_In reality, I wasn't ready. Because I will never be ready with you. At that point I knew that you weren't the one. And there wasn't any way I'd give it up and disappoint myself, even from all the pressure of the school and my family to maintain our perfect little relationship._

That was the way she hadn't broken down, Scorpius realized. She'd been true to herself first the whole time. She'd let her last name touch the rest of her life, but she wouldn't let it touch her pride, her morals, everything that was truly important to her.

That was what he loved about her.

_Not everyone gets a happily ever after like Victoire and Teddy._

_Well, I suppose you got frustrated, because next thing I knew, I found you shagging Lily during my Head Girl rounds._

_And then I dumped you in front of my partner for rounds and never looked back._

_I found it sickening that you didn't even go out with Lily after we ended. To think, that you threw away a two-year relationship for shagging._

_I'm not heartbroken. I sure as hell didn't shed any tears over your stupid, lame ass. I didn't lock myself in my dorm, I haven't broken down and eaten all the chocolate in the kitchens. I'm not heartbroken because I wasn't in love with you in the first place. You didn't hold that special piece of my heart, and you never fucking will, because you don't deserve it._

No one deserved that special piece of her heart, but he hoped to god that one day, he might come close.

_But I am fucking mad._

_Because I trusted you, let you in, thought you wouldn't ever try to hurt me…_

_Because I thought our fucking friendship meant more than your stupid fucking dick.._

_Because I'd given my trust so freely, and you were another person that just threw it away…_

_I loved a little boy who helped me catch fireflies, who made me feel special. I am grateful to him for being there for me when I needed him._

_I don't know who the hell you are, or who you think you are, but I hate you. I hate your cheating guts and I hope you burn in hell with that bitch._

_-Rose_

_PS.: Give this to the Wicked Witch. You know who._

Scorpius understood that Rose felt conflicted about Lorcan. He'd been everything she could've ever hoped for, but his betrayal had ended up being one of the deepest because of that. He had been a good friend but a shitty boyfriend, and Rose couldn't hate him fully, because when it came down to it, he had been there for her.

But now she had no one.

And as Scorpius sat in her seat, he realized that by reading her words, by listening as she poured out her soul, he was being there for her.

Was it so bad that he wanted more?

* * *

><p><strong>HEY guys.<strong>

**So. Once again, I must apologize for the lateness and low quality of this chapter. There was literally no Scorpius action here. But it was time to move on from this chapter, and get back into writing this story. I've been branching out to other fandoms lately and there's just too much to read, and not enough time to write afterwards. :D **

**Oh, and do we have and Sherlock fans out there? Because I've been addicted to that lately as well.**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you for your reviews. I was astounded by last chapter's response and touched by people's praise. I am so glad that this story holds this much meaning to you. On one of my other stories, one of my reviewers called themselves "a fan of mine" and I literally freaked out from happiness and weirded-outness (not a word, but let's pretend it is). **

**As before, reviews help me write, and yes, reviews long after publishing do help!**


	7. Dominique

**An update in less than a month? Is this really happening?**

**Yes, it really is.**

**Thank you so much for all of your reviews for the last chapter :D I don't have time to thank you all personally, but I will say that I love each and every one of you. I'm honored that you would compare my work to someone's like Jay Asher.**

**I'm hoping to finish this story up soon (after this chapter, there are only 3 left! I don't know whether to feel sad or a bit relieved). I'm going to be surprisingly busy this summer (trying to be an overachiever is so tiring. Sigh.), but I am going to try my best to write these chapters quickly, but also well.**

* * *

><p>It was Friday morning. Scorpius was ill in his dormitory, his dormmates already gone to breakfast.<p>

Okay, he wasn't really that sick.

After thinking of Rose's letter to Lorcan last night, deconstructing and analyzing it over and over again in his head, he hadn't managed to get a wink of sleep. Rose had been angry, furious at being betrayed, but brokenhearted? Scorpius didn't sit well with that. The dark bags under his eyes seemed to convince his dormmates he really was unwell.

And he had to face the truth.

He was falling in love with Rose Weasley.

In truth, he couldn't really grasp if it was love or fascination at first. He's admired her even before he'd uncovered her secrets. And once he did, he'd been captured. He'd seen a side he never thought she had. It was enthralling, but also sharp, like wielded daggers.

Like the daggers her close friends had so carelessly thrown at her back.

He got out of bed and grabbed the white book from his bag, not bothering to change out of his pajamas. He hadn't wanted to leave her precious words in plain sight on his nightstand.

He settled back down in his four poster bed. As he was fixing the pillows so that he could sit upright, he remembered.

Rose hadn't revealed who the next recipient was.

She'd only called her the Wicked Witch.

For some reason, the name seemed familiar to him. Perhaps it was the alliteration?

Cautiously, he reopened the book.

_Dear Dom,_

_Does that nickname piss you off?_

_Good._

_Poor, poor Dominique. The girl who would never live up to her older sister, who would never get what Victoire had, who never settled for what she got._

Dominique. Dominique Weasley had been the Wicked Witch. His fists tightened, his knuckles turning white. Of course, he knew who Dominique Weasley was. She was the party girl of the school, in the league with that of James and Fred Potter. While Rose had been the golden girl, Dominique was a full-out bitch, and everyone knew it. If fact, she seemed to flaunt it, at least to the students, never the teachers.

And Rose had mentioned her several times in passing.

In Alice's letter: '_However, we were really never that close in the first ten years, considering that I was always with Albus, and you hung around with Dominique more often than not.'_

And in Lorcan's: '_Dominique laid her claim on you the first time she touched your arm and fluttered her lashes.'_

It was obvious that she was the Wicked Witch that Rose was hinting at. Why hadn't he made the connection before?

_We'd never been close, even as family. We were just too different. You were blond, part-veela, bubbly, and I was Hermione Granger 2.0, only with ginger hair._

_You were born to lead, and I was content in solitude._

_From a young age, you craved control. And it came easily for you. You were born earliest in our year. You had the beauty, and some of the brains. You knew how to manipulate. You knew what someone wanted to hear, and what people didn't._

_As soon as I said I didn't want to be a follower, you turned against me._

It was very strange, Scorpius reflected, that he'd never really seen the cousins associate. At first glance, you couldn't even tell that they were related. Their looks contrasted, as well as their personalities.

But Dominique had been a Gryffindor with Rose, as well as in the same year, meaning that they had shared a dormitory.

Oh Merlin.

_Imagine, being 7 years old and having your cousin tell you that you were an ugly bookworm that would never live up to being Aunt Hermione, so why bother even trying? With my unruly hair and disgusting clothes, you said, I'd die old and lonely, the little freak of the Weasley family, the shameful one. _

It was almost funny, Scorpius thought, it you really looked at it. Dominique had called Rose the freak, but Rose had turned out to be the most successful one out of all the children so far. Quidditch player, academic genius, prefect and then Head Girl.

_And you'd use the nickname "Rosie," the one I absolutely despised. What the adults didn't know was the reason I hated it. It was because you always used it in a sickeningly sweet voice, as if you were giving me advice and I was better off listening to you and taking your words to heart._

_And when Lorcan and I became friends, you hissed those very words at me again, telling me to back off because he was yours and had I forgotten my place, because no one would ever really become friends with me. Lorcan was only using me to make you jealous. And then you looked into my eyes, and saw vulnerability._

_And then you laughed._

_That cold, icy laugh. You turned around and asked Molly and Alice and Lucy that wasn't it funny, that little odd Rose Weasley actually thought Lorcan was interested in her? _

_You turned back to me, and I remember these words very clearly:_

"_You, Rosie, are nothing. Nothing. Every single person you will meet will only stab you in the back, because who would actually want to be near you?"_

_And then you flounced off with your little posse, leaving me there, fallen in the field of dying grass, clutching onto my book for dear life._

_After that day, when I told Lorcan what you had done and he assured me of his honorable intentions (fuck that, the bloody bastard), we deemed you the Wicked Witch, after the villainous monster in the Super Merlin comic books._

That was where the name was from! Scorpius remembered briefly from Rose's letter to Lorcan: '_I was more than glad to catch fireflies with you at night during those summers, and listen to you talk about the latest issue of Super Merlin.' _Scorpius had read the comics himself, having nothing to do while alone at the Malfoy Manor. He'd hid the issues from his father, who insisted they weren't good for his education.

His mother had bought them in secret for him, giving him a smile each time.

_During that time, I noticed the tense relationship between you and Victoire. At dinner, you would smile happily at your parents, and then when your sister asked you a question, you would respond coldly. It puzzled me, especially because she was older than you. Victoire was not a person you could bully; therefore, there was something else going on._

_And then I caught it._

_You were resentful of your sister._

_I mean, how could you not?_

_Victoire was part-veela, blonde, and beautiful, even more so than you. She was brainy, being a Ravenclaw. She was the oldest of the Weasley children, not including Teddy. She was compassionate to everyone, and all the children and adults simply adored her. _

Victoire Weasley. Scorpius remembered her, a foggy memory form first year. He'd been lost on his way to the Great Hall, having no friends to walk with. James, who'd been tagging along with Victoire, completely ignored him, but the blond girl had simply smiled at him, pointing to her Head Girl badge and saying that she would help him find his way.

It was difficult to group Victoire and Dominique together. They were polar opposites in personality; no two sisters could have been any more different. In a succinct way of putting it, Victoire helped first-years, and Dominique stepped on them with her stilettos.

_And Teddy did as well._

_That very first day at King's Cross, when news broke of Victoire and Teddy's relationship, I saw you look away, tears brimming. You remarked bitingly at your posse that you wanted to be alone, because their incompetence was dampening your mood. _

_At that point, I wanted to help you._

_I really did. _

_But then I thought back to years ago, when you called me ugly, worthless, shameful. When you said that I would never measure up to someone like you. That I didn't deserve to be a Weasley._

_And I passed your compartment while talking to Albus (another asshat) without giving a damn._

Dominique Weasley had been in love with Teddy Lupin.

Scorpius remembered Teddy Lupin quite clearly. Although they were never at Hogwarts at the same time, they were related, after all; they were third cousins once removed. They'd shared some tense dinners at the Malfoy Manor. When news broke out of his and Victoire Weasley's engagement, the Daily Prophet had had a field day.

And at the Wedding, Victoire's maid of honor, Dominique, had broken out in tears during her speech.

He'd originally thought they were tears of happiness, but now he knew: they were tears of sorrow.

_Karma's a bitch, huh?_

_Throughout Hogwarts, I strove for perfection. In times of exhaustion, I heard your words ring over and over again in my mind._

_Turns out, your prediction of everyone stabbing me in the back was right._

_Every. _

_Single. _

_Fucking. _

_Person._

_You said, all those years ago, that I didn't deserve to be a Weasley._

_Well, you know what?_

_I don't even want to be a bloody Weasley anymore._

_You fucking Weasleys don't deserve someone like me._

_As the muggle saying goes, next time you might want to keep your enemies a little closer._

_So, Weasley, have a nice life._

_(Not that it's going to happen though, with the karma and all.)_

_Let's see if you can pass this on to Hugo without feeding him a snarky insult._

_(Highly improbable.)_

_Rosie_

* * *

><p>At those last words, Scorpius could only stare at the pages in shock. She'd just denounced her family, the most famous in all of the Wizarding World, and separated herself from them.<p>

Every person from that family had only brought her anguish and pain. They'd broken her, over and over again, until she'd exploded from pain.

By cutting herself off from her family, she left her entire life behind.

She was done with perfection. She was done with coping.

She was ready to break free from her chains.

And by signing off as Rosie, she'd cut Dominique deep inside, forcing her to become vulnerable as she once had been.

Scorpius could only stare in wonder.

Rose Weasley did not need his compassion.

She just wanted to be able to trust someone.

* * *

><p><strong>OMG FAST UPDATE YEE.<strong>

**You guys love me for this. Admit it.**

**I couldn't have done it without your inspiring words. Shoutout to nick55 for sending me a PM to urge me to write. It's a type of motivation that only writers can understand. If you PM me, you will definitely get a reply back very quickly (:**

**Let me know your thoughts on this chapter. Did you like it how Scorpius pulled quotes from previous letters? I thought it was a nice touch.**


	8. Hugo

**Oh my god guys, AN UPDATE! Two weeks later! Yeah, don't get used to it. **

**Thanks for all the reviews, alerts, favorites and compliments :) As I said before, I'm flattered that you all love this story so much. It's been especially encouraging because this story is difficult for me to write.**

**Well, this is Hugo's letter, as you have all known since Chapter 2. The content is very different from the other letters, which is a reason why this was so hard to write -_- you'll see later on. But to do that you actually have to read the chapter YEEEEEEE LEGGO.**

* * *

><p>After reading Rose's letter to Dominique, Scorpius was still reeling in shock.<p>

She'd trusted him.

_Why?_

Was it possible that she felt something for him? That she wasn't just doing this because she felt like she owed him an explanation, because she'd never given him a chance?

What if he wasn't the only one in love?

His mind was about to go in overdrive when his stomach protested. He remembered he'd skipped breakfast to feign illness. Looking at the time, he realized it was almost lunchtime. Time just seemed to stand still when he was in Rose's world.

His stomach growled again, and Scorpius resigned himself to the fact that he would need to eat before continuing to read with his whole self invested in her words, much to his annoyance.

Not wanting to make an appearance in the Great Hall, he set a Disillusionment Charm on himself, not bothering to change out of his pajamas. Grabbing the little white book, he headed out.

* * *

><p>The moment Scorpius took the invisibility charm off once he got into the kitchens, he realized he wasn't alone.<p>

He spotted a girl sitting at a small table, where the house elves were cleaning up what seemed to be leftovers of chocolate cake. She was probably there for comfort food. Not wanting to intrude, he quietly moved to the other side of the kitchens.

It was then that he noticed - the girl had a halo of golden blond hair.

Only one girl had hair like that.

Scorpius would've laughed to himself if not for the fear that he would be discovered. The odds that he would run into Dominique Weasley in the kitchens, right after he had read Rose's letter to her, were almost impossible.

Yet here they both were.

A house elf approached Scorpius, its eagerness to please visible in its expression. "Would you like something to eat or drink, sir?"

At that, Dominique's head snapped up and turned to look at Scorpius. He noticed that there were black streams, no doubt of ruined makeup, running down her cheeks.

Two seconds later, she was gone. Scorpius was surprised she hadn't Obliviated him first.

After requesting and eating his sandwich, Scorpius looked at the book, sitting so innocently on the table. It'd been habit for him the last few days to carry it with him wherever he went, so that Rose's words were close to him all the time. He hadn't realized he'd picked it up before heading to the kitchens.

Scorpius figured that now, many students would be roaming the halls, seeing as it was lunchtime. It would be impossible for him to head back to the Ravenclaw dormitories - he'd end up bumping into too many people who couldn't see him. And if he didn't cast the charm, then he would have to walk back in his pajamas.

He reached for the book, not noticing that his fingers were trembling.

_Dear Hugo,_

_I want to start off by saying that I love you. More than any other person in the world. _

_Granted, it's pretty hard to compete with the rest of our family. In more ways than one._

_But when you were first born, I was the first one - after our parents, of course - to hold you. I was the one who had fun dressing you as you got older when Mom was too busy to. I was the one who read books to you, and played with you, and begged Dad to get you a toy broomstick because we needed another player in the family._

Hugo Weasley. Rose's little brother. Of course, he'd seen the ginger-haired boy once in a while, more often than not erupting into laughter over at the Gryffindor table. Hugo was well-liked by the general population of Hogwarts, Scorpius knew. He was charismatic, funny - basically, the exact opposite of Scorpius himself.

_You were one of the youngest in the family, and the most innocent, the most cherished. You were like a little ray of sunshine, always smiling no matter what happened. You broke your wrist once during a family Quidditch game and I remembered that you just laughed it off while everyone else was crowding around you, discussing if you needed to go to St. Mungo's or if Aunt Angelina's skills as a Healer were enough. _

_I loved being your older sister. I really, truly did._

_But then I went to Hogwarts - and something changed between us._

_Truthfully, it started before, on that fateful day when I got my Hogwarts letter. Mom and Dad were ecstatic, and Mom kept going on and on about how I would do so well there, because I was just as smart and bright as her when she was my age. Dad kept telling me that I should try to make the Quidditch team as a first year, like Uncle Harry did. _

It seemed to Scorpius that the perfect adults of the Weasley family were not so perfect after all. Scorpius knew firsthand how difficult it was to live in your parents' shadows - his father was Draco Malfoy, after all - but he hadn't known much about the older Weasleys personally. They just seemed so... untouchable. He'd known that Rose had felt the pressure of being their child, but he hadn't realized that her parents had _forced_ that pressure onto her.

_And then I noticed that we didn't spend much time together anymore. I was just so caught up with preparations for Hogwarts and you... well, you weren't. And you wouldn't for another two years._

_Sure, we pretended that everything was okay. Often I wondered if I was the only one noticing, if I was just being deluded. It didn't help that when I came home on break, Mom and Dad fussed all over me and asked me to tell them all about my school life. I told them that I hadn't beaten up any trolls first year, but school was still pleasant._

_And then another year passed, and you got your Hogwarts letter too. I was more excited than Mom and Dad combined. You were going to be at school with me. I could finally reconnect with you, spend more time with you, and maybe this nagging feeling that something was wrong would just... disappear. _

_But it didn't._

_I still remember the second day of that year. I'd asked you if you wanted a tour of the school, a la Weasley style. We hadn't sat together on the train, so I thought maybe this was a good time to start trying to bond._

_Your exact words: "Don't you have something better to do than to spend it with your failure of a brother?"_

_Granted, you'd said it in a teasing tone, so I didn't think much of it. You said that you had planned on exploring the castle with Lily later that day. Since I knew what being at Hogwarts for the very first time was like, I relented._

_And then I learned a little later that Lily wasn't speaking to anyone in the family - including you._

_Why had you lied? I spent that night thinking about it in bed. Why didn't you want to spend time with your sister? Had we really drifted apart that much?_

_I came back to those words again:_

"_Don't you have something better to do than to spend it with your failure of a brother?"_

Hugo felt inferior to Rose.

Of course, who wouldn't, with Rose Weasley as a sibling? She was the kind of girl most parents wanted for a daughter. Since no one knew about her broken side, her life just seemed so... easy. Not a hardship to worry about. She had talent that she didn't need, seeing as she was a Weasley.

_After the whole Lily situation, I remember you were heartbroken. I tried to comfort you, to tell you that I knew how you were feeling because I'd gone through the same thing with Albus. _

_You laughed bitterly. "Perfect Rosie, you don't understand. How could you?"_

_I began to see the scars on your wrists. I wanted to help so badly, but you pushed me away._

_I told our cousins about it - at least, the ones that still talked to the family - even though they and I had never been close. They laughed it off, said I was being paranoid. Baby Hugo? The one who was always laughing and smiling and joking around, depressed? Impossible._

Rose's desperation was tangible, her tone emotionally tired. Scorpius could visualize Rose writing this very passage at her desk, only to break down in frustration and sadness. In all her past letters, the events had occurred months, sometimes years before. But Hugo's situation was still happening as she wrote it, fresh in her mind.

_I went back to you, but you pushed me away, every single time with more force than before. I don't need you, you said. You should get back to your grades and your Quidditch. Don't bother with me. No one noticed except you. It'll be over soon, I promise._

_It'll be over soon, I promise._

Suicide.

Rose had mentioned before, in Lily's letter, about Hugo's self-mutilation, his anguished cries at night. By only being given a glimpse of it, he hadn't realized the real consequences - depression, and then a downward spiral that led to... the end of a life.

_Those words rang in my head constantly. I knew what you meant. I was scared shitless for you. I was trying to help as much as I could. I sent letters to our parents. They said they'd talk to you when you and I came home on break, but the subject never came up. _

_And you kept pushing me further._

_You threatened me to keep my mouth shut. By this time you were bigger than me - stronger, too. _

_Hugo, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I am the older child, that I get good grades, that I play Quidditch well, that our parents display too much favoritism towards me._

_I'm sorry. I really, truly am._

_But you need to know - being Rose Weasley isn't that much fun. It's stressful, it's hurtful. _

_You see how I'm alone most of the time at Hogwarts, I know you do._

_Mom and Dad have always expected things out of me. Hell, the whole family did. Rosie is going to get all Outstandings on her O.W.L.s. Rosie is definitely going to be a prefect and then Head Girl when she gets older. Rosie is going to score the winning goal in the Quidditch Cup Final. Rosie this, Rosie that._

_You know me. You know I can't bear to see disappointment on people's faces. _

_Being Rose Weasley is not fun. It's pure torture._

_I want you to do two things._

_First, I want you to tell your parents everything I said in this letter about them. The expectations, the pressure, everything. That they had a part in this. That Rose Weasley buckled under pressure, and she's not sorry that they're disappointed._

_And Hugo, I just want you to... live. I want you to be happy. Don't think about Lily anymore. Don't think that you were the only one that drove me to leave Hogwarts - it's been coming for a long time, least of all from you. I'm sure that you've been getting a lot of attention since my disappearance. Don't feel guilty about it; enjoy it, please. Keep laughing everyday and smiling that certain Hugo way, only this time, do it genuinely. This is my last gift to you._

_In return, I ask for a favor. Can you give this to Scorpius Malfoy?_

_I'm sorry about everything between us._

_I'm sorry about leaving, too._

_I love you. We all love you. Don't you ever, ever forget that._

_Love, _

_Rose_

In that moment, Scorpius understood.

Rose didn't hate her family. If so, she wouldn't have left; she would've tried to prove them wrong by staying.

It just hurt too much to love them.

She distanced herself so her pain could end.

But what if Scorpius could show her that love didn't have to be painful? That it could be beautiful, painless; instead of a ton of bricks oh her shoulders, make her feel as light as a feather?

Another, more urgent thought lurked in his mind, the whole walk back to Ravenclaw Tower.

_What if she didn't want his love?_

* * *

><p><strong>Not much Scorpius input in this chapter... I wanted to just highlight Hugo's letter and how it was so different from the rest. The next two chapters are all Scorpius action though, not to fear!<strong>

**Eh... I didn't like this that much. But it's long, so I hope that satisfies you guys somewhat.**

**Review to let me know your thoughts! Oh and yeah... do you guys have ideas for the ending? I can't promise you I'll use them but I'm having major writer's block with the conclusion, and I think if I can throw around some ideas, I'll actually get somewhere. **


	9. Rose

**Hi everyone! Sorry for the delay. You guys are all so kind with your encouragements, and I felt horrible for not posting sooner, but real life got in the way (aka my AP classes) and I was barely getting enough sleep, let alone finding the urge to continue on with this story.**

**By the way we hit the 100 reviews mark! But since a lot of those don't count (in my book), I'm not sure what is the number of real reviews. I would do a shoutout for the 100th but at this point I'm not too sure about anything.**

* * *

><p>Friday afternoon. Scorpius had just gotten back to Ravenclaw Tower after lunch, eager to pick up where he had last left off. Rose had mentioned that Hugo was the one who had slipped him the little white book, which meant that Rose's journey was almost over. Scorpius was almost a little excited to know that this time, she would be writing directly to him, finally giving him some insight on her thoughts.<p>

Even though Rose had told him all the events leading up to her departure, Scorpius still didn't understand her. The reasons were explained, but to him, Rose Weasley was still an enigma, a puzzle waiting to be solved. It was like she had given him the pieces one by one, and now it was time for him to fit it all together.

He collapsed on his bed, flipping to where he had bookmarked his last place.

_Scorpius-_

_Most people don't understand why I think Professor Snape was the biggest hero of the war. Many are confused when I say so, especially since I'm related to the Chosen One, and I know all the typical war heroes personally._

It was a slightly random topic for Rose to start off with, he noted. But then again, it was a little mysterious. Severus Snape had been honored as a hero after the war, but all too soon his contributions had been forgotten and Slytherins, in general, had returned to being the blamed for much of the conflict. His dad had mentioned him a few times in passing, but whenever Scorpius enquired further, he was met with a silencing look.

_They say he did his part for selfish reasons. Because he loved Lily Evans too much, he paid the price he thought he owed by protecting Uncle Harry. His doe patronus was his story, his fate._

_As a kid, my mom often took us camping in the Forest of Dean, where, according to her, Uncle Harry saw the doe patronus, and it led him to Gryffindor's sword, the one he used to kill the horcruxes. _

_That legendary lake became my favorite spot to just sit and think. Now that I can apparate, I visited often over the summer. I would stand near the tree that Uncle Harry said Snape was standing behind, and I would try to imagine myself in his place. He loved deeply, unconditionally, just as I love my family._

He could see the connection she was making now. Because Snape had loved Lily Evans, he'd done inconceivable things, trying to right the wrongs of the past. Rose, too, loved her family, even after what they did to her, but she was trying to fix things by leaving. She thought it was for the better.

She didn't know how they were breaking, without her.

_As I sit across from you this very moment, late at night in the library, the tension between us almost tangible – I'm scared._

_Rose Weasley, scared? Impossible._

_But I am._

_I've never poured out my secrets like I just have. Each of those six people played a role, but they only knew a piece, a miniscule part of the whole picture. Maybe that's why they thought it was okay to do those things - because little Rose Weasley has a perfect life, so it's okay to mess it up sometimes. It's okay when, once in a while, things turn a little shitty._

_I know running away is wrong. I know it is, which is why I tried, at the beginning this year, to resist doing it. They say, with determination, you can do anything. I was so close. One more year and I could be free, I told myself. Only one more year._

_But it hurt, Scorpius. It hurt so much, it was breaking me apart, over and over again, every waking moment. It tore right through me until I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't breathe, couldn't function - I just wanted everything to disappear. I wanted to disappear._

_Everything seemed to fall in place, after I realized what I had to do. Most of Hogwarts left me alone. The teachers let me do my own thing, even if my grades slipped a bit. While my parents were reminding me to turn in my application for both Healer and Auror training, I arranged things in order and waited for the night I had decided on. Having my parents expect so much, but not having any desire to fulfill their wishes - it was so exhilarating. It's exactly that feeling you get on a broom, hair whipping in your face as time slows and all you feel is lightness. The freezing wind starts to take effect and you can't even feel your fingers anymore as you try to stop the quaffle going through the hoop but for some reason, it's worth it. And with the adrenaline rush and sometimes, victory - it's indescribable._

Unlike other passages Scorpius had read, here Rose's tone was so... alive. Of course, he had known she was a quidditch player, but having not played himself, he wasn't quite sure what she was alluding to. But the way her words seemed to convey her undeniable joy - it was refreshing. It seemed the amazing that she could still feel this way, after her angst and pain just sentences before.

_I used to only be able to find that on the Quidditch pitch. Before I started taking it seriously, and before my dad starting putting more pressure on me, of course. The pitch was the one place I didn't have to act prim and proper and know the answer to every question, because success meant being in the moment and enjoying every minute of it._

_It was only recently that I discovered that life is supposed to be that way too. There are ups and downs, but in the end it's supposed to be rewarding enough for you to want to relive it again. That was when I realized that I wouldn't. Not for anyone, not even for Hugo._

Scorpius knew what that meant.

_Not even for you._

He did mean something to her, something she had cared about but ultimately had left behind. He understood why she left. This was supposed to be the end, the encore, when he was going to set the book down and in the next few years, forget all about Rose Weasley and her problems.

No. He wouldn't let that happen.

_I find it funny, really, that I didn't come to terms about a lot of things until I finally made that decision to leave. I started sleeping and eating more; the teachers noticed, at least. People seemed to think that I had finally moved past everything, that I was ready for the new changes that would undoubtedly start happening._

_And I was. _

_I feel like I deserve that life. The one I would want to relive, over and over again. Not everyone gets it, I know, so I feel a bit selfish._

_But is it so bad for me to want to have that in my grasp? To take hold of the reins, for once, and never let go? I haven't completely decided if this makes me a good or bad person. I am selfish, like Snape was. But does that mean what I'm doing is wrong? Is it possible to do the wrong thing for the right reasons?_

Scorpius truly thought that Rose was much too hard on herself. No, Rose was not a bad person for wanting that life. Wasn't that what everyone wanted? Isn't that why those six people had hurt her in the first place, really? Except she had the courage and the determination to go through with her actions, and the sensitivity to do so in the least painful way possible.

_What's done is done. No regrets; I won't let myself._

_Thank you, Scorpius Malfoy. Thank you for being there, those nights at the library, when I started to think I was slowly going insane but you were the one thing that was always unchanging. Thank you for caring enough to read this until the end, if you have. Thank you for listening to my story._

_I am Rose. Not a Weasley, just Rose. I am not Head Girl, nor am I a star quidditch player. I like to listen to music, ponder about philosophy. I secretly love to ice skate. I can't choose one single book as my favorite one. I find the quiet people the most interesting. I favor hot chocolate and warm fires over air conditioning and fruit smoothies. I like dancing in the rain because no one can tell that I'm crying. The smell of damp wood is one of the scents in my Amortentia. I love my friends, the ones I still have. I love my family, even though I tell them I despise them. I run away when I'm afraid, but this time I'm not scared - just determined to live, love, and laugh freely._

_I am Rose. I am me._

Scorpius flipped the page, hoping for a P.S., a small note that might have alluded to where she was hiding now.

It was blank.

Dammit.

Her last words had their intended effect - Scorpius felt like he really knew Rose, not Rose Weasley, now. All those things that people thought of her didn't define her identity. Only she really knew herself, and she was revealing it to him because she was thanking him for all he had done.

The thing was, it felt too much like a goodbye.

She didn't want him to find her, even though he wanted to. If she did, she would've told him her location. The only place she had talked about in the letter, in passing, was the Forest of Dean.

Wait.

_That legendary lake became my favorite spot to just sit and think. Now that I can apparate, I visited often over the summer._

Maybe she still did.

_I secretly love to ice skate._

At this time of year, the lake she was talking about would be frozen over.

_I favor hot chocolate and warm fires over air conditioning and fruit smoothies._

Cold weather over hot.

_The smell of damp wood is one of the scents in my Amortentia._

One of her favorite places, something she loves. A forest.

The Forest of Dean. That was Scorpius' answer. She'd hidden the messages in the text, probably in case the book fell into the wrong hands.

Scorpius jumped up from the bed and hurried to change out of the pajamas he was still wearing. He was going to find a way to get to the Forest of Dean as fast as possible. But as his plan of action began to slowly take form, one lingering thought remained prominent.

_She wanted him with her._

* * *

><p><strong>Not my best work, but I felt you guys deserved this. <strong>

**So. One last chapter. I know you all are desperate for this story to be over - I know I kind of am (seriously, over a year for a ten chapter story... this is so embarrassing) - but the next update will probably take awhile. BUT I SHALL NOT ABANDON THIS! EVER! NOT WHEN WE'RE SO CLOSE!**

**Leave feedback, please! :D**


	10. Them

**Lengthy author's note at the end, beware. :D This chapter may not be my best, but it's published. What's done is done.**

* * *

><p>It was a snowy Saturday morning, just hours after he'd read Rose's final words. Scorpius adjusted his blue and bronze scarf so that it would block out the blustery wind as he headed towards Hogsmeade. He was lucky, really, that the timing was so perfect – he had a chance to get to her without breaking any <em>major<em> school rules

All around him, students were chattering as they discussed what purchases they would need to make. This weekend was the last chance for Christmas shopping, and although Scorpius usually stayed in the castle on Hogmeade weekends, it had been the perfect excuse for him to go to town. His housemates, long accustomed to his reclusiveness, hadn't even offered to accompany him.

Making his way through the entrance of the village, Scorpius quickly glanced around, attempting to find a place to begin his plan. Streams of students continued to flow in, and he realized that he needed to get somewhere the students wouldn't go. His first option was the Shrieking Shack, but there would probably be hordes of kids trying to enter what had been Voldemort's hideout during the Battle of Hogwarts. It had been named an official historical place afterwards, but people still tried to break in.

His gaze slid past the busy, temptingly warm shops and stopped when he spotted the mountains. The barren path that led to them was completely devoid of people – exactly what he needed. He started forward, looking behind to see if anyone was following him, before his feet carried him down the path.

Now the easiest part of his plan was complete. Scorpius climbed into one of the caves of the mountains, ignoring the puffs of air from his breath. He took out his messenger bag, sifting through its contents – food, water, a substantial number of galleons, a spare change of clothes, the little white book – before finding what he needed.

_The map_. Scorpius had never visited the Forest of Dean, which meant it was highly unlikely he would make it their in one piece, if at all. He would be lucky if he managed to get to England, really. The apparition teacher had said Destination was the first of 3 D's needed to be successful in traveling, but now he would be completely blind while traveling. Yes, he knew, the general location of the forest, and of the lake, but he was just hoping for the best.

Stuffing the map back into his bag, Scorpius took a deep breath and closed his eyes. This was it. There was no going back. If he really did manage to find Rose, he probably wouldn't be coming back. And if he didn't, well, he'd probably be too lost to make it back to Hogwarts. Was he ready for this?

Rose's bright, smiling face flashed in his mind.

Scorpius spun in place, not even thinking about destination, determination, or deliberation; just _her._

* * *

><p>Scorpius' eyes flew open before he clutched at a stabbing pain in his shoulder. Slowly removing his hand, he saw the blood staining his coat and starting to drip down onto the pure, white snow. Not only had he not been able to bring any Essence of Dittany in case he Splinched – it took too long to brew on short notice – but he had injured his wand arm, meaning he couldn't perform any spells to staunch the flow of blood.<p>

But he was here, he knew. The snow here fell more softly, and the harsh wind of Hogsmeade had died down. The trees surrounding him were completely bare.

Scorpius took his wand of his pocket, trying to ignore the pain.

"_Point Me."_

Scorpius knew that the lake Rose had described was in the southern part of the forest. With his wand pointing North, he headed in the opposite direction.

* * *

><p>Scorpius did not know how long he had walked in the forest, softly calling out Rose's name and using the Four-Point Spell every few minutes to ensure he was going in the right direction. The biting cold numbed his face as he pressed forward, leaving a trail of blood behind him.<p>

He had really been stupid, hadn't he? Going someplace he had no idea about, to find a girl who was practically impossible to track down. Maybe she hadn't wanted him to come after her. Maybe he had deduced wrongly….

Scorpius hissed in pain, stopping to lean against a tree trunk and squeezing his eyes shut. He was feeling light-headed, from either the blood loss or the freezing temperature he did not know.

"Scorpius."

He shut his eyes, wondering if he was starting to go insane, hearing her voice. This was bad. Really bad, If that was true, he would soon lose all his energy and die here, cold, _alone=_

"_Scorpius."_

The sound of footsteps tentatively falling on snow.

_Could it really be?_

"Oh my Merlin, _Scorpius_." The footsteps were faster now as whoever it was – who he_ hoped_ it was – clumsily ran towards him. "You're bleeding everywhere, Merlin, let me get the Dittany – Scorpius!"

It was her. It was her. Scorpius felt his body sag in relief in response, before he let go.

* * *

><p>He rubbed at his eyes as he slowly came to. He didn't know where he was, but he was <em>warm, <em>which meant he was either in heaven, or in hell.

"You're awake."

It was said quietly, without surprise. Scorpius blearily opened his eyes to find her, sitting down next to him and staring.

Scorpius' eyes traced every line of her face, every change that had happened. She was definitely skinnier that before – there was no way she was eating properly, in a forest in the middle of the winter – but for some reason, Scorpius thought she looked more alive than she had before. Her hair, which had always been a fiery mess, was haphazardly tied back, and when he looked down, he saw her pale hands holding his.

"You're awake," she said, relieved. "When I saw the trail of blood, and found you – my heart stopped, Scorpius."

"I'm fine," he replied, his eyes never drifting away from hers.

"If you had died," she countered, "it would have been on my hands."

They stared silently at each other before looking away, embarrassed.

Scorpius took this opportunity to examine where he was. It was a tent, spacious but cozy, which distinctly smelled of _Rose. _There was no fireplace, so there obviously had to be a heating charm. Books were strewn across the table, as if someone had picked them up and half-heartedly thumbed through them before throwing them down again. From the blanket on the coach, he could only assume that she had slept there while he had taken the bed.

"I waited for you," Rose said, her eyes trained on her feet but her voice still strong. "I had no idea if you had gotten the book, or if you had read through all of it, or if you had found the message… I lost track of the days, waiting. After what felt like weeks, I started venturing out and searching for you, and then two days ago, I finally did."

"I'm glad you did," Scorpius responded. "You saved my life."

"I only returned the favor."

Silence dominated once again, the candle flickering and making strange shapes against the tent walls.

"Did I... did I do the right thing?" Rose asked, this time her voice alarming broken. "I thought I did, but now I can't be sure…" A choked sob escaped from her lips. "I said I was strong enough, but I'm not. I'm not, Scorpius –"

"You are," he cut in firmly. "You're not alone in this, Rose. Not anymore." He got out of bed and pulled up another chair next to Rose, just breathing her in. This was it. She was real. She was here. She wanted – no, _needed_ – him here. He tentatively settled an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him.

She froze, her body stiffening from his touch, before she slowly relaxed. She turned her face so it would be covered by his shirt. He could feel the wetness of her tears seeping into the fabric, but he made no motion to pull away. This was enough, for him.

The seven reasons why Rose Weasley disappeared – they were the only reason why Scorpius Malfoy had fallen so deeply, sincerely in love with her.

* * *

><p><strong>ANNNNDDDD that's a wrap, everyone!<strong>

**Holy crap. My first ever completed, multi-chaptered story. I think I'm going to cry, guys. THIS IS MOMENTIOUS. I never thought I would be able to complete this story = heck, I didn't think I'd get over 30 reviews. But somehow, you guys actually liked my writing, or liked my plotline, or whatever (although I really have no idea why). I've finally finished a Scorpius/Rose fic and I've even gotten reviews that say it's good. I'm so lucky to have you guys.**

**There's a lot of angst and pain in the story. I'm not even sure why, considering all these things that happened to Rose haven't happened to me, at least not on such a big level. I wrote this because I wanted to tell Scorpius and Rose's story - or at least on of many possible stories. My future fics - such as Wizard's Chess - will be totally different universes. (No sequel, sorry! But I'm finished with this universe).**

**I'd like to thank hordes of people – MoonNightmare, for helping me develop this idea in the first place and for being so supportive. To people who reviewed every chapter and kept me going – you have no idea how much your compliments meant to me. To non-reviewers who still managed to stick with me for so long. To favoriters, alerters, and to even people who just discovered this story – thank you.**

**But most of all, thank you to Rose and Scorpius, for gifting me with their characters. I might claim this story, but really, they are the stars of this humble little tale of mine.**

**So…. Epilogue? You decide.**


	11. Seven Epilogues

**seven epilogues**

* * *

><p><em>They change their names, their appearances, their lives. They are not Scorpius Malfoy and Rose Weasley anymore - they are free.<em>

* * *

><p><strong>i.<strong>

Two weeks later finds Scorpius and Rose arriving, inconspicuously, at Malfoy Manor. They are 10 pounds thinner and so, _so_ much more happier.

Draco and Astoria and kind to Rose. They are very understanding of her situation - she doesn't even need to tell her story. They trust Scorpius, and so when he asks to finish his schoolwork from home, they let him. When he asks for part of his inheritance early, they do not hesitate.

England does not hold anything over them anymore. And so they find themselves on a muggle airplane with fake passports, feeling unnoticed and lost in a sea of faces -

- and it feels _amazing._

They change their names and appearances and their accents through some unauthorized spells and they end up touching down in New York City, a place neither of them has visited before. It's everything London isn't, much to their surprise, and Rose falls in love with the bright lights and flashing names, the rushing crowds of people, the rhythm of it all..

Draco and Astoria gift them a beautiful apartment, much more expensive than they could ever afford by themselves, in a small Wizarding neighborhood near Times Square. It is modern and sparsely decorated, with clean lines and little color. The interior design centers around the view, which at night is a myriad of bright lights, seeming like little stars that are just within grasp.

They become Nathaniel Williams and Juliette Miller, just two ordinary school graduates trying to find their way into adulthood. Somewhere along the way, they buy rings to prove their love, and they send his parents pictures. He goes into Auror training without any prejudices holding him back, and she finds another passion to make up for the lack of Quidditch pitches in the bustling urban jungle.

Pages upon pages of ink, scribbles and words in all their glory, her beloved characters, of being lost and finally being found. After numerous rejections and late nights and encouragements from him, her first novel - autobiography, really - sells incredibly well; the critics say it is because of the depth of the emotions she conveys in every sentence, twisting her reader's hearts as they cry tears of sorrow and joy. It is popular enough so that she gets fan letters and requests for appearances and then her agent insists she do a book signing tour in England, where the craze has finally hit.

* * *

><p><strong>ii.<strong>

It has been five years since she has last stepped foot in England. She tears herself inside, an inner struggle for reasoning. She has enough here. But maybe it is time to accept the past.

She asks him what he thinks, but he refuses to give a straight answer, telling her he will never tie her down in anything. So she asks him to accompany her, but he has such a busy career and it just so happens he will be on a mission to Egypt for one of the three weeks she will be there.

Five years later, and she is back in London, alone _(although not really, because she will always have Scorpius, and he is more than enough)_, not exactly sure what she's hoping will happen.

After a few days of settling in and adjusting to the time difference, her agent sends her out to the wolves - a press conference, in other words. It's not her first one, and so she fields questions easily, a demure smile gracing her lips. Because Juliette Williams is always polite and charming.

"A question in the back?" Rebecca, her publicist, asks, nodding to the reporter.

"Mrs. Williams, one of the protagonists of your story, Daniel, is a very caring individual that, in a way, rescues Elena from herself. Who was your inspiration for this character?"

The answer is on the tip of her tongue. She lifts her eyes to look directly at the questioner, but suddenly, time stops and_ itcan'tbeitcan'tbe_, but it is.

Alice Longbottom looks almost exactly as she did five years ago.

"My... husband," she replies, struggling to maintain her composure. "He... he's an amazing person. He really is my other half. There were so many times when I felt lost, writing this book, because I didn't know how to tell this story, and then after I did, there were so many rewrites and rejections that I was so close to giving up. But Nate was the one who would make me coffee on those late night, even if he was dead tired from training. He was the one who led me out of the darkness, who held out his hand for mine... he's everything to me."

She knows her last sentence must be confusing, but she makes no effort to clarify, and so Alice nods her head and writes it in her notebook.

"That's all the time we have for today, I'm afraid," Rebecca jumps in, aware that she's obviously not ready to keep answering more questions. "You can contact me at..."

Rose gets up to leave, smiling at the reporters, but as soon as her face turns away, her eyes are squeezed tightly shut.

She shouldn't have come. Stupid, stupid, stupid...

She finds herself clutching her cellphone in the hallway, dialing a very familiar number on reflex.

"_Hello?"_ his voice rings from the other end.

"It's me," Rose answers. Her legs shake from what she has been through, and she has to lean against the wall for support.

"_Is everything alright?" _His concern is tangible.

She wants, more than anything, to tell him who she just saw, to rant and rage to him, but all at once, she understands. This is not his closure. She must do this alone. "...yeah, I'm fine." She closes her eyes, savoring the sound of his voice. It reminds her of what is back home, what she has now. "I just... needed to hear you."

"_Missing me already?" _he teases. _"Couldn't even wait until it was morning over here..."_

"Ugh, just go back to sleep," she says, but she knows he can hear her smile. "I know you have a busy day tomorrow."

They say their goodbyes and _'I love you'_s, and she hangs up just in time, because there are footsteps rounding the corner.

"Hi," Alice says, beaming. "My name is Alice Longbottom, I'm a reporter for the Prophet... I just wanted to say that I'm such a big fan of your work."

_Funny, the villain is based off of you._ Rose bites it back and instead offers a smile. "I'm flattered."

"I'm sorry.. I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. Was that your husband on the phone?"

Rose smiles wider, genuinely this time. "Yes, it was. I don't think he was pleased to be woken up in the middle of the night though."

"How long have you been married?" Alice asks, her eyes sparkling. _Who is this person?_ Rose thinks.

"Four years now," she answers. "We were young, right out of school, and stupid, but I don't regret any of it."

"Wow," Alice breathes in awe. "You were so young! I only just got engaged recently, It's strange, considering we're the same age."

"Who's the lucky man?" Rose enquires politely. Curse Juliette's polite tendencies.

"His name is Albus."

She struggles to find words. "...Potter?" she asks hesitantly. She can't believe this. Albus and Alice, together? _How?_

"Yes, I... oh! There he is now!"

Rose turns slowly around to see Albus Severus Potter in the flesh, strolling towards Alice with his hands in his pockets. He raises one of his hands in greeting as Alice smiles and runs to him, dragging him behind her.

"Al, this is Juliette Williams," Alice says, a beautiful smile blooming on her features. "She's the one who wrote _Seven Reasons Why_! The book I've been telling you about!"

Albus nods and smiles politely, and Rose does the same.

This is too surreal.

"We're going off to lunch," Alice tells her. "I would be honored if you came with us."

"I have a previous engagement that I can't avoid," she lies.

"Oh." Alice is crestfallen. "Well, I hope to see you again before you leave London."

"I'm sure if fate decides it to be, it will happen," Rose says faintly, as her eyes search Albus'. There is something new there, something she has not seen in over 10 years. It is light, it is hope, it is _love_.

And it is for Alice.

It stings, she supposes, that Alice could bring him out of his darkness when she herself could not.

But they are all happy in the end, so Rose lets it go. After all, they are much more different than they are before.

Maybe enough to deserve forgiveness.

* * *

><p><strong>iii.<strong>

About a week in, Rose and Rebecca decide to treat themselves to a fancier place for dinner. It is in Diagon Alley, where Rebecca has never been and Rose has to pretend she doesn't know where every little shop and stand is.

Merlin's Table is dim and lowlit, a perfect destination for a couple on a date. Rose and Rebecca, feeling slightly awkward, are seated at a table near the entrance.

A few minutes later, Lorcan Scamander comes walking in, alone.

Rose resists to urge to hide her face and instead stares at her menu even more intensely.

And then Lily Potter enters, sitting down across from him.

"Rebecca, I need to use the restroom."

Safely in the bathroom, Rose leans against the granite counter and attempt to breathe. She was fine with Alice and Albus. Really, she was. But to see Lorcan and Lily, _together..._

The door opens, and Lily Luna Potter waltzes in.

They politely smile at each other, and Lily walks up to the sinks in order to inspect her hair in the mirror. Rose stares at Lily's reflection. Her face is thinner; she is older, that much is true. But she still holds her classic beauty; high cheekbones, pouty lips.

"I'm sorry, but you seem really familiar," Lily says suddenly. "Have we met before...?"

Rose panics for a few seconds, then looks at her own reflection. Chestnut hair, Blue eyes. A completely different face. There is no way she can be recognized. "I don't think so," she answers. "But you might have seen me on a book cover of some sort."

She gasps in realization. "You're Juliette Williams! Oh, wow! I've read your book. It really is amazing. My name's Lily Potter, by the way."

Rose lets a flash of recognition surface in her eyes - enough to show that she understands Lily is the daughter of the one and only Harry Potter. "Thank you."

"Are you here with your husband?"

_What, so you can steal him? "_No," Rose sighs. "He's on assignment and he couldn't come with me to England. Are you here with your husband?" The questions slips out suddenly, as if she has no control over the words that come out of her mouth. Maybe she really just wants to know if her suspicions are correct.

"Oh, no," Lily laughs quietly. Rose tries to remember the last time she heard that. "He's just a friend. We like to share dinner sometimes and catch up."

"It seems like a date..."

"Too much has happened between us to be involved romantically," Lily says, her tone somber and nostalgic. "But I really do love him, as a friend."

For some reason, Rose suddenly feels much better, although she's not sure why. Lorcan and Lily's relationship - or lack of - shouldn't be something she cares about. She told herself to move on from the betrayal, It's not like she still likes Lorcan - Merlin, no. But it makes her a bit relieved, she guesses, that the affair itself was less meaningful that it could've been.

"I think I've been in here long enough," Rose says. "It was nice meeting you... Lily."

* * *

><p><strong>iv.<strong>

The next meeting, she is fully prepared for. Rebecca insists Rose needs to buy a dress for an important Ministry gala that she has been invited to, after they heard she was in the country; Rose can only wonder who insisted she come.

And so they find themselves in Dominique's Shop for All Formal Occasions, and Rose is starting to thinking letting Rebecca choose the store was a bad idea.

"Oh, you have gorgeous eyes," Dominique gushes. "I know the perfect shade of blue that will match them. No one will be able to resist you."

_Ironic, considering you used to say I was the ugliest girl you'd ever seen. _"You're too kind."

"No, no. I'm so glad I get to dress you; everyone in England has read your fantastic book. It was really hard hitting for a lot of people, including me."

"Really?" Rose asks, the disbelief filtering into her tone.

"Yes." Dominique finishes taking her measurements, then lugs out a giant catalog and begins flipping through, intent on finding a certain fabric. "When I was younger, I did some things that I'm not proud of. I was a horrible friend, daughter, sister, cousin... I was bitchy, mean, rude, and jealous of other people. I pushed the people I respected away and thought myself as invincible."

"You're not the only one who's made mistakes," Rose intones.

"Yes, but... I'm sure even those in America heard, right? About Rose running away?" Frozen, Rose can only nod. "Looking back afterwards, I felt like I was the main reason for why she disappeared. I was nothing be evil to her. And for a long time, I couldn't let go of the fact that I was to blame." Dominique continues to flip pages. "But after reading your story... I realized that Rose could have found somewhere better, just like Elena did. I mean, Elena was so much happier with Daniel than she had been with her old life. I hope that Rose did the same. And I'm happy for her, for having the courage to run away."

Rose doesn't know she is crying until she feels the tears falling into her lap. "I... I didn't know my writing could affect people that way."

"It did," Dominique confirms. "I just... I want to thank you for sharing that story. It made such a huge impact on me, and on people I know, too." Dominique hands Rose a handkerchief, which she takes gratefully.

"Now, let's find you a dress to look amazing in."

* * *

><p><strong>v.<strong>

Rose hasn't tasted Fortescue's ice cream in five long years. It was always been a favorite of hers, as she visited the parlor almost every week during the summers. Mint Chocolate Chip and Orange Sherbert, too completely different flavors stacked together, but so good. People has teased her for having such strange preferences, but she thought they worked.

She lets her craving lead her to Diagon Alley again, the day before the Ministry gala was supposed to be held. It was a warm, sunny afternoon, and Rebecca had gone off to talk to another publisher, who was attempting to secure rights to translate the book. It was just pure luck that Rose doesn't have any interviews or book signings scheduled after that morning.

She patiently waits in line, passing by the door and smiling as she spots the table that she and Hugo always used to sit at, basking in the warm sunshine. She orders her ice cream, pays a few Sickles, and turns around to sit at her table...

...to find Hugo sitting down already, furiously scribbling notes.

Rose discreetly looks around, but there aren't any empty tables. It isa Friday afternoon, after all, and many people are just getting off work.

"May I sit here?" she asks quietly. He nods without taking his eyes off the textbook. Rose can see the title clearly from where she sits: _Poisons and Antidotes, Advanced Edition._

"A Healer-in-training, huh," Rose says softly. Hugo finally looks up, but his expression stills at the sight of her ice cream.

"Those are some strange flavors you have there," he says, his voice cracking ever-so-slightly.

Rose has the urge to smack herself. How could she have been so stupid? No one else eats these flavors together.

"Yes, well, this is actually my first time trying it. My friend said it was his favorite."

Hugo nods slowly. "It's just that those are my sister's favorites. I've never seen anyone else try them together."

"Your sister must be proud of you for training to be a Healer," Rose says, attempting to deflect any questions he might come up with.

"Yeah, I hope so..." Hugo sighed.

"Why did you decide to become a healer?" Rose asks, tilting her head to the side. "I'm curious. You don't really seem the type."

"My cousin Lily convinced me into it. We'd gone through a lot of fighting over the years, and both of us were in some pretty messy situations. My sister was the one that fixed a lot of things, and... I guess I felt like I owed it to her, in a way."

"I'm sure your sister doesn't need you to repay her," she replies softly. "She loves you very much."

"She gave me so much that I didn't deserve, always," Hugo admits, looking into the distance. "I had this huge production in my head, that one day she'd come back all broken and bruised and I'd be the one to save her, after everything she's done for me."

"She's probably fine," Rose says, following Hugo's line of vision. Flourish and Blotts, of course. They'd spent hours in there, browsing the shelves together, and then their mother would let them each choose one to take home.

A childhood long gone, but a sweet memory nonetheless.

* * *

><p><strong>vi.<strong>

Rose doesn't know why she didn't expect it, but Ron and Hermione Weasley are at the Ministry gala, and it just so happens that they are introduced in the beginning of the evening.

Too much closure can be a bad thing, she thinks.

"It's a wonderful piece of literature," her mother comments on the novel. "You're a very talented writer."

"Thank you." It feels strange; after so many years of pursuing her mother's praise, she finally has it. Of course, she had to run away to get it.

"I'll share a secret with you," her father says. "When your book came out, I wanted to believe so badly that Rose was the author."

Her throat tightens. She can't breathe. The sounds of clinking glasses and small talk fade away in the background.

"Of course, it was all just wishful thinking," Ron laughs wistfully. "She was my little girl, after all. But your book gave us hope."

"Hope that she's found what she was looking for," Hermione clarifies. "We realized a lot of mistakes we made when we tried to be good parents to her... I can't tell you how much I wish I could just use a time-turner and undo everything."

"And it's hard sometimes," her father continues, "not knowing if she's alive, or if she's doing fine, if she's found a husband or had kids yet..."

"It's a struggle, for sure," Hermione finishes. "And we will never stop searching for the answers. But we were losing hope, and your book gave that back to us. So thank you."

In that moment, Rose thinks she's ready. _I'm right here,_ she wants to scream. _It's Rose. I left and I changed but you changed too and maybe we can be a perfect family now._

Instead, Rose smiles, thanks them for their compliments, and leaves straight for the airport.

* * *

><p><strong>vii.<strong>

A long flight later, and Rose is unlocking the door to the New York apartment. It's two in the morning and Scorpius should be asleep, so she tries to make as little noise as possible as she lets herself in. A quick shower and she is slipping into bed next to him, as he shifts a little and groans.

"You're back early," he whispers huskily.

"I couldn't wait to see you," she replies, smiling as she snuggles into his warmth. Almost two weeks of loneliness, and now she finally feels she belongs right where she is.

Because if she had gone back to her family, she couldn't have had _this._

"Did anything exciting happen in England?" he mutters, already slipping back into sweet dreams as he wraps his arms around her.

"Not at all," she answers, eyes fluttering shut.

She has many more than seven reasons to stay right where she is.

* * *

><p><em>This was wayyy longer than I expected. Of course, I tried to bust this out in one sitting because I felt I had put this off long enough - the idea of seven epilogues was from about 2 months ago - so now it's 1 in the morning but I think I like this ending.<em>

_So many people requested an epilogue that I wanted it to be perfect. This isn't, but I think it's good enough. We really get to see a side of Rose's character, and how with Scorpius she has become much stronger as a person._

_And no, she doesn't reveal herself. I never intended for her to._

_So, what do you all think?_


	12. Author's Note

Hello, everyone!

This isn't a new chapter or a second epilogue (sorry if I gave you false hope), but it _does _contain some pretty important news.

I started planning/writing Seven Reasons Why more than a year and half ago. At that point, I was just starting my sophomore year of high school - I was still pretty immature and naive. I wanted to write a darker, angsty story, but at the same time I really didn't know how to accomplish that, and how to showcase that through my writing. I was still pretty much a kid - not to say that I'm not right now, but I think I've grown, as a person and as a writer.

Now that I look back at this story, I'm slightly ashamed that my most popular writing (and my only complete multi-chapter story... don't judge me?) is littered with grammar mistakes, awkward sentences, and abrupt revelations. It's not something that I would enjoy reading myself - in fact, I'd probably wonder why it was so popular in the first place (which I still do). Also, the writing style is a complete contrast from the first chapter and the last, showing how much I've grown.

This can mean one thing, and one thing only: _edits._

So yes, this story will be going through edits in the near (but not _that _near) future, and author's notes will most likely be removed as well. Please don't think of this as a ploy to get more reviews by "cheating." I'm still learning a lot from being on this site and it's just a personal writer thing. The fact that my less-than-stellar writing is up on here makes me feel icky.

I'm not entirely sure if I'll be taking all the chapters down or if I'll just replace one at a time - I'm leaning towards the first option, just because it would be really awkward for someone to read a newer version of chapters 1 through 3 and then a crappy version of chapter 4 and onward - but if you have any preferences, let me know.

Also, if you have any questions at all, PM me instead of reviewing so that it doesn't add to the review count.

Thanks for all your love and support this past year and a half, and I hope you will continue to do so!

halcyon calamity


End file.
